


Love Letter

by heelipsupremacy



Category: LOONA (Korea Band)
Genre: Angst, Death, F/F, Fluff, Lots of Angst, You might cry, it's kinda heavy tho be careful, this entire fic is an angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-29
Updated: 2020-06-29
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:21:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 26,416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24987460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heelipsupremacy/pseuds/heelipsupremacy
Summary: Jinsoul is a ghost who still lives in her old apartment. One day, a girl moves in without knowing anything about it. Interested in her, Jinsoul tries to get her attention by moving some things around. But it doesn’t work, and now Jungeun is terrified.
Relationships: Ha Sooyoung | Yves/Kim Jiwoo | Chuu, Jeon Heejin/Kim Hyunjin, Jo Haseul/Viian Wong | ViVi, Jung Jinsol | Jinsoul/Kim Jungeun | Kim Lip
Comments: 23
Kudos: 238





	1. Death

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELLOOOOOO:)
> 
> This is my first English fanfic, sorry if there are any mistakes. 
> 
> It took me almost a month to finish writing it. I almost dropped out, but I love this story so much I'm glad I didn't.
> 
> I want to warn you that this story deals with themes like death and it's very pessimistic in general, so if you feel bad about it, please don't read it. Or read it together with someone else. 
> 
> I hope you like it! 
> 
> If you want to follow me on Twitter my @ is soolipsz

\- You just don’t get it! -Jinsoul said, frustrated. - At this point, I did everything I could but it seems like she’s sceptical.

\- Maybe you could do more - Hyunjin hinted, grabbing Jinsoul’s attention without much work. 

The blonde kept quiet, waiting for the younger girl to finish her sentence, but nothing came out of her mouth. 

This situation had been going on for a while. Three months, more specifically. Since the new resident from Jinsoul’s old apartment had moved in. Her name was Kim Jungeun, she was a music major and had a loud friend called Jiwoo. 

Up to now, this was the only information Jinsoul had about her.

Apart from the times Jiwoo was there, Jungeun seemed quite calm. She knew how to cook, and countless were the days when the apartment would smell heavenly good. She could sing, and the rainy nights had a perfect soundtrack due to her angelic voice. There was almost nothing Jungeun couldn't do. However, she wasn't tall or strong, so Jinsoul had to help get things from the top of the shelves for her. 

But the problem is...Jinsoul is a _ghost._

Who died 8 years ago. 

Well, she wasn’t 100% dead. That is what _coma_ is, isn’t it? 

But Jinsoul knew that eventually her body would rest. The machines would no longer be able to hold her here, and she finally would rest. That's how it worked. The universe would decide, and she would accept it.

As a result, Hyunjin and Jinsoul spoke as if the latter was no longer alive. It was hard to accept her friend giving up fighting for life, but in time Hyunjin learned to respect. She threw away her selfishness and obeyed her friend's wishes. 

It would be easier that way, if the two of them could pretend, even for a moment, that things were still as before. Two friends talking casually, without being separated by life.

\- I’m telling you, there’s nothing else to do to make her notice me. - Jinsoul said, sighing loudly. 

Hyunjin laughed at the drama. 

\- First of all, you have to consider the fact that you are dead. - The black-haired girl took a sip of her coffee before continuing. - I bet she will be very scared once she finds out the spirit of a dead woman is in love with her. 

\- You’re not helping…

\- Second of all, even if she acknowledges your existence, how will both of you get into a relationship? She’s human and you ain’t one anymore. 

Jinsoul felt attacked. At no point did she say she wanted to have a relationship with the girl. Hyunjin simply liked to tease. As she went to fight back, a deep voice caught Hyunjin's attention, making the two of them stop talking for an instant. Jinsoul heard a piece of the conversation, understanding that the person had asked if Hyunjin wanted to see Naruto later.

The ghost smiled with sorrow and waited a few more seconds before she could talk to her friend again. 

\- Sorry, I haven’t told Heejin about…. _this_. - Hyunjin apologised, a bit embarrassed with her weeb side being revealed.

\- Don’t worry, you have your reasons. - Jinsoul tried her best to hide her sadness, but Hyunjin could read her old friend. 

8 years ago, Jinsoul had a car accident. At 3 am, she was driving within the speed limit when a truck hit her on the driver’s side, sending the small car down the shore. Jinsoul blacked out immediately. Accordingly to the doctors, it was a miracle she wasn’t dead. Therefore, people had hoped she would wake up soon, but as time went by, not even the doctors thought she would be able to make it through the coma. 

Keeping her alive had been Hyunjin's decision, no matter how much Jinsoul asked her not to. She didn't think it was fair to interfere in something when there was, in fact, a chance. Losing hope in 8 years was easy, but Hyunjin wouldn't give up on her friend so easily. Especially since she could still see her and talk to her. 

Not losing her friendship with Hyunjin was, without a doubt, the greatest gift Jinsoul had ever received. After so much misery from seeing who she loved just leave, having her best friend around helped her feel less lonely. 

Being able to see Hyunjin and her girlfriend happy always made Jinsoul equally happy. Memories of the time when Hyunjin cried for not having the courage to ask Heejin out often came to mind. She remembered how the girl used to cry for seeing Heejin dating Hansol. But not always remembering those things was good.

Most of the time, Jinsoul felt miserable. With a bitter taste in her mouth. The taste of longing. 

Every single day of every single month during these 8 years, Jinsoul had cried. She was trapped in Earth, sentenced to watch people’s life get better or worse, while she couldn’t move a finger to change her future. Because there wasn’t one.

At least feeling the tears run down her face could make her feel less...dead.

That’s kinda funny _. “Feel less dead”._ To say that you have to know what makes you feel alive. 

And that Jinsoul had discovered three months ago. 

\- Why does this girl affect you so much? - Hyunjin’s unexpected question brought Jinsoul back to reality.

Jinsoul thought, tried to come up with something. It was a difficult question. And at the end of a minute, she didn't have an answer.

A cold breeze ran past them, blowing Hyunjin’s hair. The smoke coming from the coffee she had just made vanished. It was cold outside, telling by the big yellow hoodie under the leather jacket the younger girl wore. Not having a physical body kept Jinsoul from noticing the temperature and all those things living people could feel, so she had to be over-attentive to people’s behaviour in an attempt to recognize what was happening around her. And maybe feel like a part of it.

That made Jinsoul realize she knew how to answer her friend’s question. 

\- It’s like having a body. 

Confusion spread all over Hyunjin’s face, probably trying to comprehend what Jinsoul had just said. 

The moonlight covered both of them, setting a nice scenario to all that deep conversation. No artificial lights coming from the city, no noise coming from the streets and no one that could hear their confessions nearby. Just like when Hyunjin and Jinsoul used to sneak out of their bedrooms at dawn to stargaze together. 

If she tried, she could pretend that nothing had happened that night eight years ago.

\- When I'm with her, I _feel_ things. I really do. - Jinsoul said, visibly happy with the simple mention of Jungeun. - The way she cooks mesmerizes me, or even when she dances alone around the house makes me want to smile because she is beautiful. If she gets too close to me, it feels like something inside my chest is going to explode. 

Hyunjin paid attention to Jinsoul's expressions, seeing something rare. Happiness. 

\- But the most important detail for me is that when I hear her singing or when I see her sleeping so peacefully... - The ghost made a pause, looking for a word that could describe what she felt. - I feel like I’ve found _peace_.

Again, it would be difficult for Hyunjin to understand what those words meant. Peace is something abstract, not easy to comprehend.

But Jinsoul didn’t have to understand, she could _sense_ the meaning of peace now.

Maybe finding out that the whole “peace” afterlife was bullshit played a bigger role in Jinsoul’s life as a dead person. Contrary to the peaceful state of mind humanity preached you achieve once you die, the woman had a fake brain working nonstop to make her suffer even more. S

he wasn't dead or alive. She was the middle ground. The uncertainty in her physical form. And not being able to escape that reality killed her little by little.

But even if Jinsoul _wanted_ to die, she could not. 

This suffering was forever. But there was a chance to change that.

If a girl could be the illusion that would save her from living an afterlife full of pain, it wouldn't matter what the consequences of that would be. 

Although, Jinsoul still believed she was worthy to think as if her actions had consequences. 

\- As much as I want Jungeun to be mine, I have to admit to myself that she’ll meet someone that can do all the things I can’t do to her. - The ghost said, lowering her head. It was ridiculous to have to say that out loud. 

A ghost and a human wouldn't work, it was pure senseless suffering. 

Hyunjin noticed a hint of anger in her friend's voice. She wanted to be able to say something that would ease her pain, but it was such a complicated situation that not even the wisest of sages would know what to do. 

Jinsoul felt powerless and dumb. Like a human. Being human is about having no power over life. It's just how it works.

\- You can enjoy life as it is right now. - Hyunjin said, pouring her cold coffee into the sink. - You can’t make her yours, but you can make her aware of you. 

\- Only if start breaking her stuff. I told you, she’s oblivious. 

After hearing that, for Hyunjin it was pretty clear what Jinsoul had to do. 

\- Well, then start breaking her stuff. - Hyunjin suggested, more like stating the obvious. - Don’t start with expensive things, though. Break a mug or an old plate, you want her to be your friend, not a ghostbuster.

\- Okay, but if she moves out it’s entirely your fault. 

\- And your loss, but guess we’re okay with that at this point. - Hyunjin passive-aggressiveness made Jinsoul burst out laughing. 

For that night, they became who they were 8 years ago. Two bros, chilling in a cold terrace, five feet apart cause that doesn’t matter they can’t touch each other. 

  
***  
  
  


Jungeun was sleeping peacefully. If Jinsoul dares to say, like an angel. 

One hour before, Hyunjin had to leave to watch Naruto with Heejin. Now alone and struggling to fight her urge to go to her old apartment, Jinsoul decided to wander through the streets and alleys. Evidently, the roads were deserted. Honestly, the ghost would be concerned if she saw someone walking there at 4 a.m. Stray dogs were the only uncorrupted souls allowed to be outside with her. 

But even that was sad. Everything about the world past midnight was sad.

Miserably, one of the dogs stared at Jinsoul. She knew animals could sense her presence, but this one, in particular, turned out to be begging for something. Their pained eyes showing how traumatised their past must’ve been triggered something in her non-existent heart. Jinsoul wished she could adopt all of them. Show them love. Not even that she could do. They were just illogical wishes. The real help would come from someone who could touch them, who could guarantee a future. 

Jinsoul understood how they felt. People had already seen them here, but they did nothing. It was as if they were invisible, just like her. 

Do you have to die to start looking out for one another? 

All of a sudden, keep wandering through the city lost its meaning. She did that to cease her lonely thoughts, yet she found even lonelier creatures that she could do nothing but feel sorry about. Shortly after that, Jinsoul was standing next to Jungeun’s bed, watching over the human as the moon illuminated her serene face. Something in the way she was sleeping fascinated the ghost. 

Throughout the time Jinsoul was with the dogs, worrying about their state, Jungeun was unconscious of how horrible the world is after the clock hits midnight. 

On the other hand, as sickening as it can be, the lack of relevance all those problems Jinsoul saw have on Jungeun’s life was amusing. Ignorance sometimes kept the sadness at a distance.

You can feel bad for people, you can try to fix the world as much as you want, but that won’t change even 1% of how shitty the world is. Putting that responsibility onto your own back is unhealthy. 

Maybe that’s why Jinsoul is so sad. She paid too much attention. 

Only one thing was worth paying attention to every second of the day. _Jungeun._

The human usually woke up at 5 a.m for no reason at all. In that case, the ghost still had one hour to come up with a better plan than the one Hyunjin had proposed. To occupy herself during that time, Jinsoul explored her old apartment. The environment felt like it was completely new to her, even though she had lived there for years. 

Each person has a story to tell, and part of it always reflects on their houses. People build their own world when decorating it. Jinsoul took that as an alternative to learn more about Jungeun without having to talk to her. As if being inside her apartment was the same as being inside her heart. Being a part of her life.

Not that those three months weren’t enough for Jinsoul to get to know her better, but a human side of the ghost refused to invade Jungeun’s privacy.

Until now. 

Beginning from her bedroom, Jinsoul tried her best to keep quiet and not move a single object out of its place. Oddly enough, not physically touching things didn’t mean she couldn’t literally throw the bookshelf across the room. Even though she was a good person - a good ghost -, she still could _haunt_ people. 

Diverting from those thoughts, a shelf filled with photographs drew her attention. Jinsoul instantly recognized Jiwoo next to Jungeun on some pictures. Most of them the duo weren’t paying attention to the camera, smiling unsuspecting of the photographer behind them. It meant true happiness, spontaneity, thing Jinsoul felt when talking to Hyunjin.

Moving on from that sudden nostalgic feeling, the ghost felt a bit lost about where to go. 

The bathroom sounded like it might have extremely personal items in there. To avoid surprises, Jinsoul opted to explore the wardrobe. Back to when Jungeun had recently moved in, Jinsoul thought it wouldn’t be a great idea to follow the girl wherever she went. She wasn’t a stalker. Thereby, Jinsoul had never seen the human in an outfit other than her pyjamas and casual clothes.

Assuming by the clothes she found, Jungeun dressed way too good. Jinsoul was kind of regretting not following her just to see the woman wearing those skirts, dresses and shirts. Sinful thoughts began to appear in her mind, making the ghost close the wardrobe at an inhumane speed. She didn't have that freedom. As much as no one forbade her, she didn't feel it was fair to Jungeun.

Hyunjin was right, Jungeun affected her. Deeply.

Finally, the blonde walked peacefully towards the study room. Her most favourite one. It brought a good feeling to her chest. There were some afternoons when Jungeun would be bored and as a consequence, she would walk to the study room and read some random book. The thing is, she always read them out loud, loud enough for Jinsoul to hear. 

_Books and stories were things Jinsoul missed the most about being alive_. Reading them, she could escape from the bad things of life and create a new world. Jinsoul wasn’t able to pick up a book and forget about her curse. Occasionally, Hyunjin would read to her, but it had a whole other impact when it was Jungeun the reader. 

Perhaps the emotion she put on her voice whilst reading or the unintended expressions she did when something in the book didn’t please her were the reasons why Jinsoul was always so absorbed by the plot. Jungeun impersonated the story as she read. 

And Jinsoul had the habit to focus on her instead of the narrative. As if the main character Jinsoul wanted in her life was Jungeun. 

Not to mention those days where Jungeun was so exhausted she just slept on the table. It didn’t matter if she was writing an essay, doing some research or simply watching random videos on YouTube. She would lay down her head on her arms and pass out.

Jinsoul couldn’t see that and not babysit Jungeun. Inevitably, the ghost would turn off the computer, turn off the lights and, depending on the day, put a blanket over her so she could stay warm. As the older one, that was her _duty_. 

There were days when Jinsoul was so hypnotized by the girl that, unconsciously, she felt pulled by some gravitational aura and without realizing it, tried to kiss Jungeun's forehead. Without success, of course. 

She tried to forget it. She couldn't let herself be carried away by lies and expectations. 

Now, looking back at the times she denied to herself the clear attraction she had for the girl, it made her cringe. 

Jinsoul craved Jungeun’s attention, and so she would _fight for it_.


	2. Afterlife

Saturday morning. The day where Jinsoul would start acting up like a real woman. 

Not a woman, but you got the message. 

As on most days, Jungeun woke up before the sun could announce the beginning of a new day. Coincidentally, the loud sound of the cell phone woke up along with her. Jiwoo was calling. It was extremely early, but neither of them cared. With a yawn, Jungeun answered. 

\- Good morning. - The habitual clean voice was raspier than Jinsoul had expected. 

\- _Good morning!_ \- Jiwoo said, excited. - _Are you busy today?_

Obviously, how had she not thought of that before? Jungeun was young and clearly went out to do things that anyone at that age would do. Jinsoul who was naive to think she would have the whole weekend to put her ridiculous plan into action. 

If life were a circus, Jinsoul would be the clown. 

To some extent, breaking things didn’t sound as bad as it did before. 

\- Sorry Jiwoo, I already have plans. - She said. Jinsoul turned to face her, finding a little hope. - But hey, we can go out tomorrow if you want. 

\- _Ah, it’s okay Jungie_. - Jiwoo sounded sad. - _There was a friend of mine asking if she could see you tonight, can I invite her to go out with us tomorrow?_

Jinsoul was begging her to say no. She might have been selfish, but don't get her wrong. Jinsoul wanted Jungeun to find someone and be happy. Preferably not now. 

\- Yeah, whatever. - Jungeun mumbled, uninterested. - Make sure that she ain’t expecting something from me.

\- _No problem!_ \- She wasn’t sad anymore. - _Enjoy your day, love you._

As soon as the call ended, Jungeun let out a loud sigh. Surprised by the negative reaction, Jinsoul spent a few seconds trying to understand why. Jungeun looked tired, even bored. It wasn't Jiwoo's fault, but something had happened. 

The ghost didn't realize the moment when Jungeun got up and went to the bathroom. She would have this time to put her plan into action. But was it the best idea? She could wait and think of something better. Time was not lacking for Jinsoul. 

Maybe a little sign that there was someone besides Jungeun in that apartment was a good first move. Not that Jinsoul wanted to make her think there was an intruder, the intention was not to make Jungeun look for another place to live. Breaking things didn't sound very smart either. If Jinsoul admired things inside that place so much, why would she destroy it? It wasn't fair to mess with what wasn't hers. 

The solution was to show that she cared.

Politely, Jinsoul waited outside, observing birds through the window. The moment Jungeun got out, clean and ready to start her day, she noticed something strange. 

The bed was tidy. And Jungeun was pretty sure she did not do that. 

Indeed, Jinsoul was a polite woman. 

Despite that initial shock, the human didn’t bother. At all. Blaming her hunger for the forgetfulness, Junged calmly walked towards the kitchen. Left behind, Jinsoul tried not to get angry at her huge failure. She had been very careful. Even too careful. Ghosts didn't fix beds. They'd knock over plates, throw books. Jinsoul wanted to be noticed, not ignored.

If she wanted to get her attention, she would have to be bold. 

Leaving a little aside from her plan B, Jinsoul stood right next to the counter, admiring Jungeun’s cooking skills. The ease with which she mixed the ingredients in the pot, knowing exactly how much of each she had to put, was truly hypnotic. It didn’t matter the fact that the human was cooking enough food for an entire army at 6 a.m. It still looked like a work of art.

Watching people’s life used to be something Jinsoul did to hurt herself. Follow Hyunjin when she went to buy bread, follow a random kid just to prevent he or she from getting hurt. Boring and daily, real torture. By now, she could consider herself a PhD in humans. 

Although with Jungeun it didn’t feel like torture, she enjoyed paying attention even to the smallest details such as Jungeun’s little wrinkles that appeared between her eyebrows when she was focused. 

Spending time admiring her would be time well spent.

Soon, the smell of food entered her nose. It was heavenly. Jinsoul had become used to control her desire to eat over the years. It was not necessary, nor would it work. It was just a way to feel better. Make everything go back to normal. It was difficult to control, however, when it came to Jungeun's food.

That was sad. Jinsoul felt sad. 

Not even Jungeun could help her in those hours. If her greatest wish was to be able to go back to normal and maybe even have a chance with the girl, nothing could help her. Not when her next destination was outside this world. 

Too lost in her emotions, the ghost pulled up a chair and sat down, leaning her head on her hands. She even heard a gasp. Jinsoul giggled. Looking up to see what was that for, her eyes widened. 

Jinsoul totally forgot about not being visible and just simply pulling a chair. 

Mouth wide open, Jungeun slowly blinked twice. The food was almost falling off the fork, it was as if she had frozen. Jinsoul thought it was funny. She didn't seem to have noticed that if the chair had moved, something would be clearly in front of her. Still, the girl didn't contain her reactions. 

Now Jinsoul's plans were beginning to work out. 

In an attempt to ignore what had just happened, Jungeun focused on her food. She had focused too much, not lifting her head for a second. The speed with which she ate was also not one of the most common. Jungeun ate as if she wanted to end it soon. Not gonna lie, Jinsoul felt a little ignored. Jungeun couldn't take her eyes off the food.

And Jinsoul couldn't take her eyes off her. 

Jungeun ate clumsily and, as a consequence, ended up getting her mouth dirty. 

An opportunity, Jinsoul thought. 

There were napkins on the table. The ghost took one of them calmly and approached the woman, taking advantage of her lack of attention to carefully clean the corner of her mouth.

\- What the… - She got up from her chair so fast it looked like it was on fire. - Fuck. 

As much as Jinsoul wanted to move some other object, she knew Jungeun was having a tough time assimilating the situation. Her intention wasn’t to make Jungeun scared and afraid of staying inside her own house. Perhaps later the ghost could try moving stuff again, but for now, it was enough. 

Scared, Jungeun left the kitchen without finishing eating. Jinsoul spent some time thinking until her eyes saw the food on the plate. There was plenty left. She couldn't just let the food go to waste, and Jungeun wouldn't be back in the kitchen any time soon. 

This time of the morning there shouldn't be so many people looking for a full plate of food. If Jinsoul could at least deliver to someone who hadn't eaten yet...

Those stray dogs. 

Last time they looked hungry. Living on the street shouldn't be easy, Jinsoul couldn't even imagine when it was the last time they had eaten real food. There were the dangers that living on the street had, someone could poison little pieces of bread and give it to them. Enough people were willing to commit these atrocities. 

Jinsoul could give them this food and greet them once again. She liked animals. 

Hopefully, they would still be in that same alley, at least there they had boxes and a roof to hide from the rain. When she arrived, there was only two of them. A small one with brown fur and the other a slightly bigger dog with black fur. No sign of the grey dog she made eye contact the other day. 

\- Hey guys, I brought some food. - She said with a low voice, full of affection. - A very talented person made it. 

The dogs didn’t seem to care that the plate was literally floating in the air. What was inside it, though, mattered. Jinsoul got closer to them, carefully so they wouldn’t be scared. In less than one minute, the brown dog walked towards her, smelling the food. The ghost let out a small grin, wishing she could pet them. 

Following their friend, the black dog also came closer, going straight to the plate to eat it. Proudly, Jinsoul observed them, hoping the grey dog was somewhere safe and warm. Later that day, she would come to the alley to check on them. For now, they seemed to be happy. 

\- Since both of you are females, I’m going to call you...Olivia. - Jinsoul pointed at the black dog, which had raised her head to “look” at the ghost. - And you...I think Choerry is a good name. It fits you. 

The brown dog kept eating, swinging her tail fast. 

It was still early to say that they would not starve, but at least they would have the energy to get food later or even to rest properly. Jinsoul wanted to be able to adopt them or find someone to adopt them, but it was hard when she couldn't talk to people. 

Leaving the alley, Jinsoul took one last look at Olivia and Choerry, praying they’d stay safe. It was at times like this that the woman felt powerless but extremely powerful at the same time. Only the Universe knows how many dogs are living in the streets without food and a roof to protect themselves. And there was nothing she could do about it. However, Jinsoul met those stray dogs and took care of them. 

It is less than 1%, but she did something and made them happier. 

For her, this meant 100% of success. 

  
  
***  
  
  


Jungeun was under the covers, trying not to panic. “This is why the rent was so cheap. This place is fucking haunted.” She thought.

First the chair, then the napkin. There was no open window in the kitchen that could at least explain why the napkin flew by itself. And the chair moving was illogical, it could only be a ghost. Jungeun never liked horror movies, much less living in one. 

She was not brave enough to leave the room. An old lady with a cane could come up at any moment and beat her. Or worse, the spirit of a child. Children were always the worst. Jungeun had noticed some things out of place in the house for a while, but nothing as obvious as a fucking chair walking by itself in front of her. 

The worst was that she had a college assignment to deliver. It was an essay and essays are always the worst. 

Jungeun had to think logically. Do the essay and meet with some spirit in the middle of the way or stay under the covers and have her foot pulled by the spirit? 

However, she fought for that spot in college. It wouldn’t be a silly ghost to make her lose an important grade. 

Then, gathering all the remnants of courage she had in her body, Jungeun stood up. Next to her bed was a metal bottle. It wasn't as if a bottle would make a difference when it came to fighting a spirit, but at least she wasn't empty-handed. 

By the time Jinsoul got back, Jungeun had already reached the study room, internally struggling to keep her courage from going away. The ghost noticed the human's hands trembling as she typed. If a single napkin managed to make her so scared, Jinsoul was extremely confused on what to do next. If she broke something, Jungeun could literally cry.

Thankfully, the human seemed to be relaxing as she wrote her essay. Lowkey, Jinsoul wanted Jungeun to forget about it and read a book, but she knew they both had things to do. Jungeun had to guarantee her grade and the ghost had to make sure her next plan worked.

Even though now Jinsoul had come up with a secondary mission, there was plenty of time to think about both of them later. As of now, paying attention to what Jungeun was doing sounded way better. 

Taking a moment to reflect, Jinsoul noticed how different she and Jungeun were. Jinsoul aced all her math exams, while Jungeun had a special talent with words and history in general. Countless were the days she spent watching documentaries about the second war and conspiracy theories. Sure, Jinsoul kept her company but didn’t understand why learning about dead people was so interesting to her. 

Ironic, isn’t it? 

The only common interest they had was music. The apartment was never completely silent. The TV was connected with Spotify and it was easy to get carried away by the different melodies. Whether it was cleaning the house or just relaxing on the sofa, there would always be a soundtrack to make the atmosphere lighter. Jinsoul liked the times when Jungeun, lost in thought, would hum some song. 

It was not dedicated to her, but there was no one to prove otherwise. 

A loud curse broke the room’s silence, drawing Jinsoul’s attention. On the computer screen was written “Low battery”, and, guessing by her face, Jungeun hadn’t saved the essay yet. The charger was there somewhere, she just didn’t know where. 

In a race against time to help her, Jinsoul ran to the bedroom, remembering the last time Jungeun used her laptop. She had watched a movie a few days ago, so it was probably inside one of the drawers. 

Hurrying up, the ghost opened all of them at the same time, fortunately sighting a black wire within seconds. Jinsoul closed the drawers without much noise to not bother Jungeun and went back to the study room. Much to her surprise, there was no sign of the human. 

Until Jinsoul looked down. 

Jungeun was looking under the desk, lying on her back. Thinking that she believed the charger would be there made Jinsoul laugh loud. But as much as the ghost wanted to keep watching Jungeun do her thing, she had to hurry or else the essay would be lost. She held the charger at table height, waiting for the girl to notice the object. If Jinsoul threw it at her, it would be worse. 

The ghost was very innocent to think that Jungeun would quietly accept a charger flying in front of her.

Not surprisingly, Jungeun banged her head on the table trying to get up because of the scare. It was an awfully strong blow since her forehead started to bleed at the same time. Worried and full of guilt, the ghost quickly plugged the charger into the computer and ran to the bathroom to pick up the first aid kit. From now on, Jinsoul really needed to think before doing anything else. 

Jungeun stayed on the ground with her eyes shut, trying to stop the blood with her bare hands. If she opened her eyes, she could swear everything was spinning. A sharp pain made her sob quietly, shrugging with her back against the wall. The guilt only grew inside Jinsoul’s chest. She should’ve been more delicate when dealing with Jungeun since the girl wasn’t used with an actual ghost living in her apartment. Keeping that in mind, Jinsoul opened the first aid kit and approached Jungeun. 

Only for the human to open her eyes.

Feeling caught in the act, Jinsoul froze. Which was not a good idea considering the bandage was in her hands. Or more accurately, floating. 

\- Stay away from me! 

Not gonna lie, Jinsoul predicted this type of conversation would happen sometime. It was easy to predict that if she was caught one day, the human would ask her to leave. Jinsoul had even prepared a brief explanation in case Jungeun wanted it. She just hadn't imagined it would happen with blood involved, but guess you can’t predict everything. 

Jinsoul had to calm Jungeun to take care of her injury. The question is, how? She can’t talk. It hit her a few seconds later that they were in the study room. Lots of paper and pen she could use to talk to Jungeun. 

Still running against time, Jinsoul took a paper and a pencil, placing it in front of the human. “Be careful, think before you write”, the ghost said to herself. She may have been more nervous about finally being able to talk to Jungeun than about the blood dripping down the girl's forehead. It felt like the first time you speak to your crush, just a little bit more complicated. 

\- Please don’t hurt me. - Jungeun said in a shaking voice, hitting Jinsoul right in her non-existent heart. 

“I won’t”, she wrote, turning the sheet so Jungeun could see. “I’m sorry I scared you, it wasn’t my intention. Please let me take care of your wound.” 

Jinsoul wrote desperately, staring at Jungeun as she finished to see her reaction. The amount of blood running down her face made Jinsoul abnormally worried, anxiety growing inside her chest as the answer for her question didn’t come. She knew the human wouldn’t die because of that, but being the reason why she got hurt did something to her.

Even with those reassuring words, Jungeun seemed to be in conflict with herself. It was difficult for her to accept that an entity had good intentions. Besides, no studies were proving whether spirits were friendly. All Jungeun knew was based on "Insidious" and "Annabelle." 

The ghost was losing her patience.

“Your forehead is bleeding too much, please.” Jinsoul’s handwriting wasn’t the best under pressure, but at least it was comprehensible. 

If begging didn’t work, then the ghost would be lost. 

Denying help, Jungeun removed her hand from her head to take the bandage on her own. She immediately regretted it, feeling such an absurd pain that it forced her to put her hand to the wound again. Jungeun was dizzy with pain.

She couldn't clean the wound and such a realization made her tense. She would have to let her spirit take care of her, which did not sound like the best of alternatives but was her last. Trying to be brave, Jungeun finally answered Jinsoul, who was already starting to get impatient. 

\- Okay...Go ahead. - Jungeun wanted to punch herself for sounding so helpless. 

Relieved, Jinsoul took the bandage and cleaned the wound, hearing low sounds of pain each time Jungeun flinched underneath her. The ghost wished she could hold her hand, comfort her in some way, but for now removing the blood from her face and making a good dressing would be the best thing to do. 

\- Who are you? - She suddenly asked. If she couldn’t run from the ghost, at least she could get to know him. Or her. Why was she so obsessed with it being an old lady? 

Jinsoul could tell by her voice that she wasn't scared anymore. She didn’t want to give much detail about herself, though. It just didn’t feel right to talk about all her life. Her sad life. Jungeun simply wanted to know who she was and why was she taking care of her. Usually, ghosts did the opposite, hence the question.

As the blonde finished doing the dressing, she took the paper to answer the question. Yet, how was she going to explain that? “My name is Jinsoul, I used to live here. Now I’m dead and in love with you”. Not even a happy emoji could make it any better. 

She had to think.

\- I’m sorry, is it wrong to ask the spirits who they are? - The genuine concern in her voice distracted the blonde.

“Stop being cute, I’m trying to come up with an answer for your question!”, Jinsoul thought, smiling. 

As the ghost reasoned, Jungeun picked up her phone to check the injury. There was an Avengers band-aid which made her laugh, finding the situation she had gotten herself into really funny. Her friends wouldn’t believe if she said a literal spirit took care of her. There was no reason to be afraid, if the spirit wanted to kill her she would be greeting Jesus by now. 

Looking away from her phone, Jungeun saw the pencil writing something on the sheet. 

“My name is Jinsoul”. 

To be honest, Jungeun expected a more detailed explanation. Her name alone was not enough. For someone who had just put an Avenger band-aid on her forehead, the ghost clearly had more to offer than that. She didn’t want a biography, but at least something that could confirm she wasn't an old woman. 

She was curious to get to know... Jinsoul.

\- Hi Jinsoul, I’m Jungeun. - She grinned. It was awkward talking to someone and not having a face to look at, so instead, she looked at the sheet. - How old are you? 

The fact that there was no manual to guide Jungeun made everything more difficult. She knew that certain questions were not allowed to be asked to spirits, so she had to be very careful. A curse for the rest of her life definitely wasn't what she was looking for.

If she knew how harmless Jinsoul was...

“I was supposed to be 26 by now”. 

That sounded sad. And it was.

Talking or even thinking about how she'd be today was a little delicate. To think about all the opportunities that were taken away from her so early. She was only 18 when it all happened. Jinsoul knew that at 26 she would have accomplished countless childhood dreams, but unfortunately, she could not control things. 

\- Oh, I’m sorry. - Jungeun apologised, embarrassed. 

“It’s okay”. The blonde tried to change the topic to not make Jungeun uncomfortable, but the girl stood up faster than her. 

Jungeun didn't understand where that boldness came from. She seemed quite at ease with the idea of having a chat with a spirit. She didn’t look like the same girl that was fearing for her life about 10 minutes ago. 

\- Do you live here? 

“Yes”. Jinsoul was truly confused - and amused - by the sudden courage that took over Jungeun’s actions.

\- Let me get you a notebook, so we can talk better. 

The truth was that Jungeun wanted to get to know Jinsoul. Maybe the fact that she was 26 helped calm her heart a little, but there was a genuine interest. The whole thought of talking to a person who had already died was exciting. Meeting new stories, new people, made Jungeun feel like she was in the clouds. 

Little did she know that Jinsoul felt the same. 

Without saying anything else, the human stormed out of the study room. There were tons of notebooks there, but it didn’t really seem to care since all Jinsoul could think was…

”Did she just indirectly offer her number to me?”

She didn’t have enough time to process, watching as Jungeun ran past her with a small notebook. The lost look in her eyes was hilarious, Jinsoul wished she could tease the girl about it. 

\- Are you still here? - Something about the way she talked caught Jinsoul’s attention. Her voice sounded hopeful as if she expected the ghost to still be there. 

Knowing what to do, Jinsoul took the notebook from her hand, receiving a flinch in return. It had two colours, red at the front and blue at the back, mixing in some kind of purple where both capes encountered. Jinsoul had never seen that notebook around, probably Jungeun kept it somewhere out of her sight. 

Watchful eyes observed as Jinsoul opened and wrote on the first page, then closed and returned the notebook to Jungeun’s hand. She wanted to know what had happened to Jinsoul, where, when, why. It was disrespectful to a certain extent. Having a dead person right in front of her didn’t help the urge to ask that, but the fear of being cursed for saying something she should’ve not said held her from doing stupid things. 

“Yes, I am still here” there was a smiley face drawn next to it, making Jungeun grin. “What do you wanna know?” 

\- Can I….ask you anything? - She felt like a child. In terms she was, Jinsoul having 26 and she having 23. However, it was more the apprehension of hurting the ghost that made her cautious.

One thing was for sure, she did not prepare herself for when the pencil moved on her left side and wrote on the notebook without taking it out of her hands. Jinsoul was sitting by her side, and being aware of it now made her chill. If she concentrated enough, she could feel a cold breeze blow under her neck. No windows open. That was definitely Jinsoul.

“You can, I’ll answer them turning the light on and off. On for yes, off for no. Is it okay for you?” 

\- Sure. - Jungeun said, trying not to think about those sensations she felt. - Shall we start?

Lights turned on. 

\- Okay...do you have any friends alive? 

“Yes” 

\- Do I know them? 

“No”

Jungeun frowned. She was hoping the answer would be “yes” so she could ask that person what happened to Jinsoul. Asking the ghost about how she died felt wrong, it could trigger something and Jungeun didn’t want to make her sad in any way. 

\- Were you sick? 

“No”

Okay, her head wasn't working the proper way. She had so many things to ask but nothing seemed to come to mind. Jungeun closed her eyes hard, trying to focus on something. She didn't know if she had time to spend thinking about these things. And that's how she thought of the next question. 

\- _Will you stay with me?_

No answer. 

Concerned, Jungeun gasped loudly, realizing that her question could have been awkward. By “staying with her”, the human meant to stay in her apartment, not in a flirtatious manner. Is it even possible to flirt with a ghost? Damn, she wanted to get inside her closet and never come out. Her ears started to burn and Jungeun felt like she would choke the moment she tried to say something. Fortunately, she hadn't ruined everything. 

All of a sudden, the lights turned on. 

Visibly relieved, Jungeun threw the notebook on the bed and ran her hands through her hair. Moments like this made Jinsoul a little glad she was invisible or else the human would be able to see her cheeks extremely red. She felt like a teenager with hormones running through her veins. The thing was that they both couldn't behave in each other's presence. They were hopeless.

Still not paying attention to her surroundings, Jungeun kept trying to stabilize her heart. There was no logical way to explain the pressure inside Jungeun’s chest. Could be fear, but she knew it wasn’t like that. Not when all the signs said Jinsoul was a good person. The unusual company would certainly be a great experience, that could be the reason for such nervousness.

The human flinched when the notebook was thrown at her. It wasn’t going to be easy to get used to living with a ghost, but Jungeun was willing to try. Opening the notebook, she saw new lines written right above their short conversation. 

“I hope you don’t mind if I stay around...I promise I’ll keep quiet :)” 

Cute.

\- No problem, it’s nice to have someone to talk to without having to leave the apartment. - Jungeun confessed, closing the notebook with a smile.

Jinsoul wondered for a second why Jungeun said that. She didn't look like the homemade type. On the contrary, to Jinsoul's knowledge, Jungeun and her friends liked to go out too much. She used to come back home drunk and Jinsoul had to hold her urge to take care of her. Listen to her sound so relieved that she wouldn’t have to go out to talk to someone made Jinsoul confused. 

Suddenly, with a pale face, Jungeun ran towards her computer, cursing under her breath. That unexpected move made Jinsoul flinch. She was prepared to hold the human, used to her clumsiness. Good thing Jungeun reached the chair without injuring herself, and now there was one little problem to solve.

The essay. 

Taking a look at the clock, Jinsoul gasped. There were only 20 minutes left. The ghost had nothing else to do but sit on the bed and watch the girl furiously type her essay. 

Hopefully, in 20 minutes, Jinsoul would be able to talk to her. Again. 

  
***  
  


The volume inside the kitchen was astronomical. Things falling on the ground were definitely waking up the neighbours, especially since it was almost midnight. Nobody knew if they were fighting or having fun. 

When Jungeun had finished writing, she wanted some excuse to talk to Jinsoul. Now she knew that the woman would stay with her in the apartment and, although she was a ghost, it would be nice to interact at least. After all, Jinsoul was there with her, simply ignore her presence seemed...wrong. 

It was when her belly growled with hunger that the human realized that she had gone a long time without eating. She could invite Jinsoul to eat something, but she only remembered that she was a ghost afterwards. She could still invite Jinsoul to cook with her, that’s how they ended up in the kitchen.

Actually, Jungeun was trying to teach Jinsoul how to cook. 

And with her being a ghost...it wasn’t easy. 

\- I’ve told you that that’s NOT how you stir the mixture! - Jungeun yelled, panting because of the time she spent laughing at Jinsoul’s mistakes. - Come here lemme show you.

The spoon quickly fell on the counter, sign that the ghost had let go. They had been cooking for at least one hour and the number of times the human had to stop what she was doing to help Jinsoul were countless. Almost like she was doing that on purpose.

Therefore, Jungeun’s clothes were a mess. There was food in her apron and flour in her hair, the latter being Jinsoul’s fault. The ghost found it cute when Jungeun would complain at her throwing flour on her. The entire kitchen had food all over the place. Of course, Jinsoul would help clean it up but seeing Jungeun lose her shit was priceless. 

\- First, you grab the spoon _gently_. - Jungeun said, emphasizing the last word. - Then you move it clockwise, lifting the mixture calmly so it doesn’t form bubbles. 

Jinsoul was looking at Jungeun with heart eyes. Being invisible had its perks, considering that she could stare at her without being caught. Or she thought so. 

\- Are you paying attention? - Jungeun had stopped stirring the mixture and had her arms crossed. Although the human didn’t know where to look, Jinsoul knew she was talking to her. 

Answering her, Jinsoul took the spoon and spread some of it in Jungeun’s face. Scared of what her reaction would be, the ghost froze when she saw her ears turn red. Was she blushing? Or about to explode? 

\- Um… - Jungeun choked a little bit. - I...I think you got it, right? Now finish this and I’ll prepare the stuffing. 

No one dared to speak again and silence filled the kitchen. Too focused to even look to her side, Jungeun kept overthinking. Jinsoul noticed the tense shoulders but chose to concentrate on her duty. 

They might have felt a little strange after that but the mood didn't get weird for an instant. It was funny to think about how comfortable they were, even if they couldn't feel each other's presence. It hadn't been a day since Jungeun had met Jinsoul. On the other side, Jinsoul had known the human for months. She had been lucky that Jungeun didn't care about her to the point of calling an exorcist. They got along, and that was all that mattered for now.

Hours later, the cake was finally ready. Looking proud at her creation, Jinsoul felt extremely happy that one of her attempts to cook went fine. She remembered the times when this same kitchen would be on fire due to her inability to cook. 

With Jungeun’s help, there was no need to call the fire department. 

Through the window, the sunlight announcing the end of the day gently illuminated the woman's hair in front of her. Jinsoul wished she could take a picture of that moment. For the meantime, that work of art would be kept inside her mind. 

\- Oh… - Jungeun whispered, placing the cake on a red plate. 

Quickly, Jinsoul took the notebook, writing just as fast so she could give it to the human. Jungeun lazily opened to see what she wanted to say, sighing even lower than her previous whisper. She sounded upset. 

“Are you okay?” was what Jinsoul had asked. 

\- I realized that you can’t eat. 

Not caring about her handwriting, the ghost tried to write without taking the notebook from Jungeun’s hand. As hard as it seems, at least she had an excuse to come closer. 

“I’m okay with that, please don’t be sad. Think of the bright side, you’ll have more cake to eat :)” 

Jungeun let out a giggle. 

\- I know I won’t be able to eat all of this by myself….

Taking a look at the cake, she was right. It was a big cake. They worked really hard on it and letting it go to the trash kind of made Jinsoul’s heartache. But she didn’t know what to do. Jungeun could invite Jiwoo over or…..she could give it to someone else. 

This time Jinsoul took the notebook. Surprised by her action, Jungeun watched as the pencil moved at a high speed, making it hard to read before the ghost was done. Never before had she been so eager to tell her something. Oddly enough, Jungeun was getting more and more anxious as the seconds went by. The pencil finally fell on the table and Jinsoul passed her the notebook. 

“I know where we can take the cake later. But you’ll have to come with me” 

Deep inside, Jinsoul knew the human trusted her. Ever since the incident that gave Jungeun a small scar in her forehead, she noticed how comfortable Jungeun was with her presence. It wasn't long ago that it happened, though. But she knew that if there was no trust between them, the kitchen wouldn't be a mess. Either way, she needed an answer. Force Jungeun to do something she doesn’t want wasn’t her intention. 

\- Sure. - Jungeun smiled. 

Jinsoul stared at the human for a few seconds, admiring her beauty. Sitting on the kitchen counter, she waited for Jungeun to get a piece of the cake. Jinsoul was happy. At no point during that day she had enough time to think of how miserable her afterlife was. She had gotten too busy talking to Jungeun, dirtying her clothes with food and laughing at her. Being able to eat wasn't so necessary, just the minutes when she didn't feel like she wanted to die at any moment made it all worthwhile. 

Jinsoul had never felt so alive. 

\- Hey, what type of movie do you like? - Jungeun asked with a mouth full of cake. 

“Romcom and horror movies, why?” 

Jungeun read attentively, taking longer than usual. Jinsoul had a peculiar taste in films. This mix of romance and horror didn’t make sense for most people, but for the ghost it did. Movies that made her cry or scream in fear were the best because they made her feel immersed in history. What's the point of doing something you don't feel?

\- I wanted to watch a movie with you. - Jungeun almost choked. Coughing a little, she continued her sentence. - We can’t do much together and...I don’t know, I’m tired. 

Jinsoul froze. It took a while before the pain in her cheeks finally woke the woman from her thoughts. Nervous, Jungeun looked away, rethinking whether inviting Jinsoul to see a film had been a good idea. She didn't know what was more shameful, to either be inviting a ghost or to be blushing about it. However, soon the notebook entered her field of vision, being calmly pushed towards Jungeun. Jinsoul seemed like an anxious child. 

“What are you waiting for? Let’s try to find something on Netflix”

Unknowingly, Jungeun looked up and scared Jinsoul. She somehow managed to look directly inside her eyes. If the ghost wasn't dead, she could swear she'd die right here. It was the first time they made eye contact and, even though Jungeun wasn’t aware of it, Jinsoul was stunned with the perfect vision of her millimetrically drawn face.

Three months would never be enough for her to get tired of the girl. And not all the time in the world would be able to slow down her heart rate every time she looked at Jungeun.

The sound of the chair dragging on the floor took Jinsoul out of her trance. Jungeun ran to the living room, jumping on the sofa, and the woman stayed behind, finishing putting the dishes away up before going to see a film with the human.

Who happened to live in her old apartment.


	3. What does life mean?

On the television screen, the woman cried, professing her love for the main character who, unfortunately, was getting married. Watching "Love, Rosie" wouldn't have been a good idea if Jinsoul wasn't a ghost. The woman was crying like a newborn, internally wanting to punch both characters for being so stupid. 

It was less than half an hour before the end of the movie. When Jungeun decided to ask Jinsoul's opinion on what to watch, the human laughed softly when the request for "Love, Rosie" was written and quickly erased by the woman. Jungeun thought it was funny how embarrassed Jinsoul was to ask for a teen romance movie. 

Now, after much provocation from the human and pillows thrown by the ghost, the two were quiet. Jinsoul didn't risk looking to Jungeun, fearing she wouldn't be able to pay attention to the film again. Unexpectedly, a short breath entered the woman's ears, finally giving her the courage to look away. 

She could not explain it, but the image of Jungeun sleeping like an angel, resting on the white blanket above Jinsoul's body messed up all her emotions. She'd been asleep for a while. Jinsoul should have noticed earlier, taking into account that the human was literally resting on her lap, but the inability to feel things took her a while to notice. 

The discovery that she could not touch things, but the things she moved could be touched was a great milestone in her life as a ghost. She didn't feel Jungeun, but at least Jungeun could feel her. 

Jinsoul tried to turn the TV off, but things were a little difficult. That was one of the biggest problems of being the spirit of a dead person. Apart from, you know, being dead. She could lift light things, like a pencil or a pillow. Heavy things took a lot of energy, and because _she was in a critical situation_ she didn't have much left. Fortunately, the controller was on her side. 

With care, the woman turned the device off and got up without making many movements. She certainly could not carry Jungeun to her room, but nothing stopped her from covering the human. She was unaware of the temperature, so all it took was one trip to her room and Jinsoul returned with two pillows and two blankets. Better left than missing. After making the sofa almost as comfortable as a bed, Jinsoul took one last look at Jungeun's serene face before going into the kitchen. 

Jinsoul occupied herself in putting the cake in a plastic bowl, separating two. One for Jungeun in case she wanted to eat more later, and one for her friends on the street. She knew the night wasn't as cold as last week and there was no sign it was going to rain. It was a quiet night, some insects singing under the moonlight created a soft melody for Jinsoul as she finished her tasks.

Had it been a month ago, Jinsoul would have been on the street, wandering aimlessly. It was funny how things had changed for her in the short span of two days. Maybe she was deluding herself, but holding on to a comforting illusion was better than accepting the harsh reality.

Looking at the clock on the wall, the woman counted how many hours she had left before Jungeun woke up. Exactly five hours. Enough time for her to rest and perhaps organize her thoughts. 

She could easily adapt if this were to be her routine from today. 

  
***  
  


Even the first rays of the sun couldn't wake up before her. Jungeun was already standing when Jinsoul opened the curtains, curious about the view. The ghost hadn't slept, it wasn't necessary, so she kept doing nothing all night. Although watching over Jungeun's sleep was a big and serious job for Jinsoul. The human looked away, noticing the curtains moving by themselves. She was there.

Jungeun smiled. 

\- Good morning. - The human yawned, running her hands through her messy hair. 

Jinsoul ran to the table to get the notebook. She returned "Good Morning" with a sweet note written, along with a happy face, delivering it to the human soon after. Jinsoul noticed the messy couch and thought it would be better to fold the blankets while Jungeun read. It was the least she could do, after all, she was a guest. Jungeun lowered the notebook a bit to see what Jinsoul was doing, smiling as he saw her tidying up the sofa.

She had noticed the way Jinsoul covered her last night. After all, she was still awake. The simple thought of seeing someone so unknown, and at first even a little dangerous, taking care of her made her blush. Feeling her ears burn, the girl tried to banish these thoughts from her mind. It had been less than 24 hours since they had formally met, thinking things beyond a weird friendship was wrong. Luckily, Jungeun remembered what Jinsoul had told her yesterday. 

\- Who are we delivering the cake to? 

Jinsoul finished folding the blanket before taking the notebook and writing just a small word.

"Dogs."

Before she could ask anything else, Jinsoul told her to go get ready. Jungeun obeyed, not being able to keep the curiosity away. She didn’t understand a thing, but it was a Sunday, _she had nothing better to do._

After 15 minutes, Jinsoul had finished putting things away and was quietly waiting for the girl in the room. Jungeun said she was going to take a shower first and the woman said it was all right, there was no reason to rush. But now Jinsoul was starting to get anxious. Her treacherous head had imagined a thousand different scenarios, forcing the woman to turn on the TV to distract herself. 

\- I’m ready! - Jungeun said, jumping into the room. - Where are you? 

Swinging a pillow in the air to indicate where she was, Jinsoul observed as the human approached and sat next to her. Her brain stopped working the instant her eyes went down to see the clothes she was wearing. A red cropped, black jeans and white all-stars. Simple, but still millions of butterflies flew inside her body. Anyone else would say Jungeun was basic.

In that case, Jinsoul was a woman of basic tastes. 

Literally, Jungeun could wear a garbage bag and Jinsoul would still say she looked beautiful. 

Because Jungeun _is_ beautiful.

\- Um...are you still here? - The human asked, a bit uncertain. 

Jinsoul, feeling ashamed to have been indirectly caught in the act, threw a pillow at Jungeun. Soon that typical smile blossomed on Jungeun’s lips, making the woman melt once again.

She had to stop paying attention to the small details or they would never leave the apartment. 

The notebook was placed in the human’s lap, containing the instructions for her to reach the alley where the dogs lived. With any luck, they'd still be there. It was early and the day hadn't even started, the three of them would probably be asleep. Something in those little animals left a good feeling inside Jinsoul's chest. She had never cared as much as she did now, and she expected them to be warm, protected and united. 

Jinsoul wanted to be able to guide Jungeun, but it was difficult when communication was literally through writing on a piece of paper. 

When she finished reading, Jungeun walked towards the kitchen to put the cake in a pot. On the table were the two pieces perfectly separated, which, for a brief moment, stopped the human's breathing. Jinsoul did everything, literally everything. And she was beginning to get used to it, something she shouldn't have been.

Aiming to be as fast as possible, Jungeun took one of the pots and walked to the door, taking nothing but the cake and her cell phone. Jinsoul accompanied her, taking the notebook. Inside the elevator, neither of the two said anything. Jungeun just looked to the side and noticed the notebook floating in the air. A little panicked, she realized that it wasn't normal for others, though it was for her.

\- Let me carry it. - She said, laughing. 

“Oh damn”, Jinsoul thought, giving it to her. Jungeun kept laughing, pulling a smile out of the woman’s face. They seemed to be in a particular world, laughing at their inattention. They didn't care, not even when one of the neighbours got into the elevator and stood in the corner, frightened by Jungeun laughing alone. 

Well, “alone”. But he doesn’t need to know that. 

  
***

The walk to the alley had been... different.

Everything was going according to the plan until Jinsoul decided to spice things up a bit. Before that, they were enjoying the day slowly waking up. Being a part of the small percentage of people awake at this time, they were able to witness the world still in peace. Peaceful enough for them to admire the singing of the birds, the smell of fresh bread and the shy rays of the sun warming their bodies. 

Peaceful until Jinsoul did her thing. 

Without warning, Jinsoul ran to a small bakery. No one noticed her presence. On tiptoe as if someone could hear her, she took a little bag and put two loaves of bread in it, taking advantage of the moment to pick up the cup of coffee that was on the countertop. The employee just watched the floating bag leave the bakery. There wasn't much to do, reporting a ghost robbery was insane, nobody would believe it. But there was no harm in stealing some food, certainly the employee wouldn't mind. 

Out of all those months as a ghost, this had been the first time Jinsoul had stolen anything. 

It would be a nice story to tell her friends.

Jungeun was walking at a slow pace, giving Jinsoul enough time to reach her without spilling the coffee. A small nudge with the bag packaging stopped the human, who turned and opened her eyes in shock as she noticed the food. Jinsoul handed everything to her and took the notebook to write a message. 

"There are some tables near the lake, let's sit there for breakfast." 

Jungeun looked around, seeing if there was anyone around. The tables by the lake were small and they were close, she didn't see why not to go there. She hardly came to this part of town. Usually, her outings involved more downtown ballads or expensive restaurants. Of course, her friends invited her because they had money, and she only bought the cheapest things. This time, she seemed to have found her newest favourite place. It was like a village, with small businesses, cosy restaurants, and people seemed more relaxed. 

Realizing she was wandering, Jungeun shook her head. Jinsoul remained analyzing the human face, allowing herself to be a little gay. Soon the girl began to walk at the same relaxed pace to the tables. Only one person was there. A lady giving food to the ducks. Jinsoul felt a bit of remorse for never having enjoyed this part of town while she could. Always too busy with college stuff, she rarely went out to explore. 

It seemed too late, but being here now was her second chance. 

Jungeun placed the bag and the cup on the table, sitting down. The smell of bread entered her nose and quickly her stomach rumbled. She hadn't realized how hungry she was until now. It was a bit obvious that she would be hungry, but Jungeun had been so entertained to admire the landscape that the complaints from her stomach went unnoticed.

Nearby there wasn't a lot of people. One or two were talking near the markets. They, however, were not alone. Each one had their relatives, lovers or friends. Together. 

Jungeun, on the contrary, was alone, but not lonely. Sometimes the physical company was not the essential one. Knowing someone was watching over her was enough. As if reading her mind, Jinsoul took the notebook just to lightly touch Jungeun's arm, showing that she was still there, beside her. Jungeun smiled, turning to smile in the direction where the notebook was. Little by little she understood how things worked between them. 

\- Wait a second. - Jungeun said, realizing something funny. - Did you pay for this? 

The ghost smiled in embarrassment. She knew it wasn't right but it was what she could do. Jungeun took a sip of coffee while the pencil moved to form a sentence. She noticed the familiar taste of coffee, realizing it wasn't any coffee. It was her favourite. In a lucky move, Jinsoul managed to steal Jungeun's favourite drink. Coffee with milk and vanilla essence. Perfect.

“Someone else paid. Consider it a gift from me and from that stranger. Now eat, I heard your stomach screaming when you were asleep”.

\- Jinsoul, I can’t believe you did that. - Jungeun meant to say as if she was angry, but the smile on her face revealed how funny it all was for her. 

The girl turned her attention to the loaves, still laughing. Jinsoul was inconsequential. And she wouldn't admit it, but knowing the woman had stolen it for her made her stomach stir. 

This time not out of hunger. 

Jinsoul spent some time watching Jungeun eat. The day was beautiful. Maybe it was the clear sky, or the smell of nature, maybe even the sound of people talking in the street. Deep down, Jinsoul knew it was because Jungeun was there with her. 

They were walking and having fun. Being treated like someone normal was a great feeling. 

The sound of the ducks caught the woman's attention. She always liked animals and had never had the chance to feed a duck. Quite specific and random, Jinsoul was like that most of the time. She had already fed doves, but ducks were a novelty. The lady was still throwing crumbs on the floor and two little bags were beside her. Jinsoul approached slowly, taking one of them. 

Two robberies in one day, a new personal record. 

At least the ducks were still eating. 

Jinsoul walked to the table where Jungeun was, intending to stay close to her while she fed the ducks. It didn't seem right to suddenly disappear, especially since it was she who asked the girl out. 

The animals really didn't care about things floating around. First the dogs and now the ducks. Some ducks got close to her pretty fast, attacking the crumbs. About three others came right after, splitting the food. Jinsoul was smiling so much her face hurt. She couldn't tell if the ducks were happy to share or if the noises they made were curses. 

Noticing the gathering of ducks near the table, Jungeun looked better and saw the crumbs floating in the air. A short laugh escaped her lips. They were lucky there was nobody around but that lady, otherwise the ghostbusters would have been called by now. 

The afterlife must be sad and intense, Jungeun could hardly imagine what it was like to be present and not be noticed. To be in the world and not be able to enjoy the things it offered. It was living in the middle where nothing happened, not being able to do something about it.

With Jinsoul, it somehow was different. Jungeun wasn't able to say what exactly. It was something with the way she acted, it made Jungeun want to try more and complain less. To do the things she wanted to do without worrying. 

Anyone looking at her would notice the admiration in her eyes. It was almost impossible to deny the happiness with which Jinsoul played with the ducks, and Jungeun, even without being able to see, knew that the woman was having fun. She was happy, and for some reason, Jungeun couldn't stop smiling.

But they had a mission. So as soon as the crumbs were gone, Jinsoul had to leave. She was a bit disappointed about having to leave the little animals behind. Maybe another day she could come here again. Maybe even bring different kinds of bread to make the ducks happy. Or even bring bread and Hyunjin, but then the ducks would have competition.

Jinsoul wrote a brief message asking if Jungeun had finished eating. The girl nodded, standing up to throw the packages in the trash. When everything was ready, Jinsoul messed up the girl's hair, showing that she was waiting. Or to have an excuse and get her attention, who knows.

The distance between the alley and the apartment was relatively short. Turns out the little stops the two of them made took time. Jinsoul seemed to have plenty of energy and Jungeun, on the other hand, was calmer, taking her time with the different things that small village had to offer.

A few meters away, Jinsoul took her notebook and touched Jungeun. It was necessary to warn that there could be more than one dog and that because Jungeun was visible they could have different reactions. But the girl was not afraid, and after reading the warning, she took the pot with the cake to open it. 

\- I'll be careful, there's no need to be afraid. - She reassured, walking slowly to the entrance of the alley. 

Jinsoul went ahead, entering a defensive mode. She liked the dogs and trusted them, but it would be hard to forgive herself if Jungeun got hurt. Fortunately, they were still there. Choerry and Olivia were lying in a corner, under a broken roof. And, much to her surprise, the other dog was with them. Jinsoul was happy to see the little animal well, the unknown longing gradually diminishing.

"Hey, little buddy. I was worried about you, how are you?" 

The woman approached cautiously, knowing that the dog could not hear her, much less understand her. But there is that story that animals can feel presences that go beyond the physical plane. Jinsoul, trying to be recognized, noticed how the dog turned to face her. A big smile opened in the woman's face. 

A little behind, Jungeun approached Choerry first. Jinsoul watched the two of them interacting, sitting next to the grey dog. Choerry had her tail between her legs as she walked towards the girl. The human couldn’t help but smile when the brown dog approached. As soon as the puppy noticed the piece of cake, the animal made a low sound and quickly her tail was wagging. 

Olivia and the grey dog seemed to understand what Choerry had said and three dogs finally went to split the piece of cake. They ate fast, letting hunger take over the actions of those three little puppies. It was sad to think about how nobody had yet volunteered to take care of them, but it was no time to be sorry. They were fine and now they had one more friend, Jungeun. 

Jinsoul had to think of a name for the animal.

\- They're so cute, how did you meet them? - Jungeun asked, without being able to stop looking at them with affection.

"I usually walk around town. I ended up meeting them by chance and whenever I can I give them food. The brown one calls Choerry, the black one calls Olivia and the grey one has no name yet."

\- Can I help you pick out the name? - Choerry raised her head for a second to look at Jungeun. She wanted to squeeze them so bad.

"Of course. I thought of Chaewon, but I think it's too formal for a dog."

\- Turn it into a nickname, like Gowon. 

"Hm...not bad. From now on she is Gowon, the mighty dog!"

Jungeun giggled. Jinsoul was a fool. And she liked it. 

A small breath hit the girl's leg, getting her attention. Jungeun noticed the cake was gone and the three dogs stared at her with their tails wagging. They seemed to want more food and Jinsoul sighed upset, knowing that the nearest bakery was about 5 minutes away. She promised herself to steal more food for the puppies. If she had to commit a crime, then let it be in Robin Wood style. Who had approached was Choerry, with her little paw touching Jungeun's leg. 

\- I think she likes me. - She cried out.

Jinsoul saw happiness in Jungeun's eyes and almost laughed. It was cute the way the girl looked dumbfounded by the puppies. The connection that developed between them was what surprised Jinsoul the most. And maybe what made her attraction to Jungeun... confusing. 

Jinsoul watched Jungeun bend down and caress the animal's belly. It was a very cute scene and more and more the woman's emotions became a mess. She wanted to be able to hug the little animals. Hug Jungeun...

There were many wishes, but Jinsoul was already happy with what she had. Keep thinking about "What if" wouldn't help at all.

\- Do they live on the street? Don't they have someone to take care of them? - Jungeun asked. Up to that moment the euphoria had prevented this thought from crossing the girl's head, as obvious as it was.

"Yes and I don't know what to do."

As Jungeun took the notebook to read she saw Olivia's loving little eyes trying to understand what was that in her hand. Her heart nearly broke in half. She couldn't let them sleep in the street another day. It sounded crazy, but it was the only idea that came up. 

\- I'm taking them to the apartment. - The girl stood up in a leap, sounding decided.

In shock - and perhaps a little admired - Jinsoul was left with her mouth open. That decision was quite impulsive, you could tell. But Jungeun's determination not to allow the little animals to spend another night in the street, another night without shelter and comfort, was greater than anything.

The day had barely passed 7 a.m. and there was Jungeun, coming out of an alley with three dogs and a ghost, about to change her life. 

It really is unpredictable. 


	4. Life is...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this one is long :)

Sitting on the couch, Jinsoul was playing with Gowon. The woman waved her pillow back and forth, attracting the attention of the puppy. At first, Jungeun was stressed with all that mess. The fur all over the house and the bites on the furniture were extremely annoying. Fortunately, Jinsoul promised to clean things up to help.

Not only that, but the whole cleaning part would be on her. She knew she couldn't offer the most special, the warmth, so that would be Jungeun's job. Of course, the girl didn't accept, after all, that was her home. It wasn't fair to push all the responsibility on Jinsoul when the decision to bring the three puppies in had been hers. After much discussion, the two of them agreed to share the tasks equally.

Today, _a month later_ , they had already taught the three of them not to break and dirty everything.

They both liked to pretend they were their mothers. Taking care of three dogs that had never received the proper treatment in their lives was an adventure. Gradually they understood what each puppy was like.

Olivia was the quiet one. She spent most of her time lying on the sofa and loved to sleep on Jinsoul's lap. Jungeun usually listened to music to clean the house and in those hours Olivia would turn into another dog, excited and jumping everywhere. They all shared that passion for music.

Gowon was Olivia's biggest company. The grey puppy was not as quiet as Olivia, but she was still relatively calm. Gowon was the most daring, Jungeun had to be twice as careful with things because Gowon always stole food or her shoes.

Finally, Choerry was the most electric. While Jinsoul got along better with Olivia, Choerry was Jungeun's faithful squire. They both got along really well. The puppy liked to help, as incredible as that sounds. Sometimes Jungeun would be fixing something or cooking and Choerry would be there, on her side, helping or encouraging her.

The best time of the day was in the late afternoon. The five of them would go into the living room to watch a movie together. There were even established places. Jinsoul and Jungeun sat next to each other. Olivia liked to sit on Jinsoul's lap, Gowon preferred to stay on the carpet and Choerry kept moving from one place to the other.

Apart from the moments they spent at home, Jinsoul made sure to go out more often with Jungeun. In those 30 days together, the number of things they had done was pretty much endless.

For the first few days, the woman wanted to take Jungeun to see the ducks again. This time, she was the one who would feed them, Jinsoul couldn't wait to see the girl interact with her little friends. It would be amazing if they weren't so clumsy. Long story short, everything went wrong.

Let’s say Jungeun was not the most suitable person for this task. The fear of being attacked spoke louder and the girl ended up falling into the lake as she tried to escape from the ducks. It turned out that the ducks did not want to attack her, they were just hungry. As a result, Jungeun was soaked and Jinsoul kept laughing. She had predicted that something like this would occur, and luckily she brought a blanket. Though she laughed, she always had a plan B to take care of Jungeun.

Almost as hard as feeding ducks was walking with the puppies. Olivia would easily get excited with the doves on the sidewalk and ended up dragging Jungeun, who screamed for help. As always, Jinsoul laughed, but she was worried. She never knew when Jungeun would fall to the ground.

With Gowon, it was different, even worse. The puppy liked to eat and together with her great friend Olivia, the two would invade the bakeries in search of food. Some employees had gotten used to Jungeun entering the store in panic and apologizing while trying to hold them both. This time Jinsoul couldn't do anything, she herself used to rob the same bakeries. Like mother, like daughters.

The only one who didn't get into trouble was Choerry. Except for the time she brought a cockroach into the apartment, she was very quiet and obeyed Jungeun.

Friday nights were the days Jungeun could forget a bit about college. Wanting to make the girl have some fun, Jinsoul spent the day looking for cool things in town that they could do together. It was almost like a date, but no one would let those thoughts get the better of them.

On a particular day, there was a food fair going on in the village. Even if Jinsoul couldn't enjoy it all, she knew Jungeun loved to eat. So they both went for walks under the moonlight while Jinsoul pretended not to be extremely admired by the girl in front of her. Cliché, but they didn’t care.

Jungeun’s habit of getting her mouth dirty by eating had not disappeared, and it ended up becoming Jinsoul's job to clean it up. It happened several times, and in all of them, Jungeun blushed. Even without seeing it, she felt Jinsoul's presence right next to her. She wanted to be able to be more discreet about feeling shy, but her ears always gave out. On the other hand, Jinsoul loved to see the effect she had on the girl.

It didn't matter if people were watching Jungeun laughing out of nowhere or talking to the wind, they learned that listening to others was a waste of time. Time that was too precious to be spent on nonsense.

But Jungeun didn't always have free time to walk with Jinsoul around town. With graduation approaching, the university asked for works to be delivered frequently. The girl felt exhausted, and Jinsoul noticed that. Intending to help, the woman set up a study routine in which she would help Jungeun. Thus, several afternoons were spent studying without rest. Well, they rested. Jungeun usually slept on Jinsoul's lap while she explained the subject.

The luck of having to write it all down on paper was that when Jungeun wasn’t paying attention, she could review it later.

However, of all those moments, one thing was missing, no matter how much Jinsoul pretended not to. The touch. Jungeun could sleep on her lap and even hold her, but it wasn't _her_. It was some object she used to simulate her presence. They were together, but so far away. For a month. A fucking month. Although Jungeun could still pretend, Jinsoul could not. She had no choice but to accept.

As they went on living together and going out together, the confusion of feelings inside the woman became more difficult to understand. It all seemed so clear at first, it should be even clearer now. But no.

And that wasn’t the only problem.

Jungeun had isolated herself. Spending the day in the apartment had become routine and she rarely allowed herself to go out with her friends. Jiwoo was finding her friend's sudden disappearance very strange. It wasn't as if Jungeun was doing it on purpose, but it was as if she _needed_ to stay close to Jinsoul.

More and more Jiwoo and her other friends were calling her, asking her out or intending to visit. The hard part was explaining what had happened during that month. How to say, clearly and logically, that she had adopted three stray dogs together with a woman who is actually a ghost?

Jinsoul also noticed the frequent calls. She even said that everything was fine, that she would take care of the three puppies while she was away, but Jungeun didn't want to.

Until today.

\- Soulieeee! - Jungeun called from the study room.

A couple of weeks ago, the two of them had entered into an agreement that talking through a notebook was quite hard. To solve this problem, Jungeun bought two moveable blackboards. Now, anything Jinsoul wanted to say she just had to write on the blackboard and ring a little bell attached to it.

They had also agreed that the study room needed reform. Some shelves were broken and the room was too small to support the new family members. The best thing would be to increase the space. And who would do all of that would be them. So Jungeun had woken up extremely excited, which eventually infected Jinsoul.

And now they were organizing the preparations for the renovation.

"I'm here, what happened?" Jinsoul wrote on the board.

\- I need to get a box from that cabinet up there, but I can't reach… - Jungeun pouted, perversely trying to get Jinsoul to help her.

That was a tactic that worked most of the time. Little did Jungeun know that Jinsoul almost had a heart attack every time she saw that cute expression aimed at her. Laughing, she brought the box into her hands. With a quick smile, Jungeun went back to her job. Jinsoul sighed, feeling like a fool. She would jump off a cliff if Jungeun asked.

In the middle of the process, a call drew Jungeun's attention. She ran to the bathroom to wash her hands and quickly returned to answer. On the screen, the name "Bunny" showed up.

\- Hello?

\- _Hey! It's me, Heejin._ \- The girl across the line said excitedly. - _Are you busy?_

\- Oh, hi! - Jungeun responded genuinely happy, realizing how much she missed the girl. - Sort of, but you can talk.

\- _Okay, it's a quick message anyway._ \- Jungeun could hear Hyunjin yelling at someone in the background. - _Sorry if you hear Hyunjin, it's just that she's running after the cat. Anyway, I was wondering if you'd like to come over, it's been a while since we've seen each other._

It wasn't just Heejin who had asked her that question. It had been a really long time since everyone had talked to Jungeun, but it was hard to get back to normal when everything in her new life seemed perfect. She was afraid of doing something and losing Jinsoul or losing her friends.

Something inside her said that she had to explain herself, and Heejin looked like someone who would understand. Sighing deeply, somewhat nervous, Jungeun made her decision.

\- Of course, what day is best for you?

\- _Could be tomorrow, we don't have many things to do this week. Is that okay with you?_

\- Yes. Then it's settled. - Jungeun said excitedly.

\- _That's perfect. Now if you'll excuse me I need to go take care of two children._ \- Heejin warned before she hung up.

But she didn't hang up.

\- _HYUNJIN STOP RUNNING AFTER THE CAT, YOU'RE SCARING HIM!_

_“HE STOLE MY FOOD.”_

A little deaf from their screaming, Jungeun hung up laughing. Going out for a while and talking to other people would do her good, no matter how much she didn't feel the need. And Heejin was a great friend, almost like a therapist. The girl listened and always had the best advice. Just what she needed.

The sound of a bell went into Jungeun's ears. Turning her back, she noticed Jinsoul's message.

"Uh...sorry to intrude, it’s just that Olivia managed to find the watermelon we hid and now she has her head stuck in the closet, can you come and help me?"

***  
  


It was almost the end of the day and they had made a lot of progress. Jinsoul had finally managed to put the three puppies to sleep and could help Jungeun. In the meantime, Jungeun had fixed all the closet doors and put up new shelves. All that remained was to demolish the wall that divided an unused room and the study room. That way they would expand the space.

For today they had nothing more to do. Jungeun only had to tell Jinsoul about her visit to Heejin's place.

When the two of them were sitting on the sofa looking for something to watch on TV, Jungeun thought it was a good time.

\- Hm, Soul?

The human waited for Jinsoul to write in the blackboard, feeling anxious for no reason.

"Me :)"

\- One of my friends invited me to her house tomorrow. - Jungeun didn't know why it was so hard to tell that she was going out. It must have been something normal, but somehow she felt a bit bad about leaving Jinsoul alone.- Do you mind? I can stay if you want I don't...

A flying pillow hit Jungeun in the face, making her shut up. Jinsoul hadn't realized how silly Jungeun was. Since when did she have to ask her permission? Jinsoul was quite relieved to know that Jungeun would go out with her friends, long time since the last time the woman had even heard the girl talk about them.

"You don't have to worry about anything. I'll take care of things while you're away."

\- Are you sure? I don't want to burden you.

"Jungeun, please, you're amazing. I owe you a lot, and I'll start giving back everything you did for me. It's the least I can do."

Jungeun was going to reply, but Jinsoul didn't seem to have finished talking.

"Now shut up and find a nice movie, I'll get you some snacks."

***  
  


Heejin and Hyunjin lived in a quiet part of town. Almost like the village Jungeun had rescued her puppies. She met Heejin when they were both working in a coffee shop downtown. Heejin seemed really weird at first, but as time passed Jungeun realized that the girl was much more than a nerd. She had a talent for many things. Painting, music and dancing, in sports she was a disaster so Jungeun wouldn't even comment. At that time Heejin was dating a boy named Hansol and complained every day about how unbearable he was. It had been out of pure impulse that the girl had agreed to date him, even out of fear perhaps. The only days Heejin didn't complain about Hansol was on Saturday mornings when a tall girl with black hair used to go to the cafeteria to order just bread. It turned out to be Hyunjin. And the bread wasn't the reason she went there.

Hyunjin hadn't yet taken the courage to ask her to be her girlfriend, and Jungeun laughs when she remembers the day the girl asked for her help to organize the proposal.

Everything worked out happily, and the two now live together as a couple. Only Jungeun had never had a relationship, much less tried. The university drained all the energy she had.

They had also done many things that they might regret today. Like the day they stole the cheapest drink they had ever seen from a market and ended up with a terrible hangover. The damage was so bad that Heejin had fainted by the side of the road and Jungeun was so dizzy she could barely call Hyunjin for help. It was worth it, and in teenage years no one thinks about the consequences too much.

Laughing at these memories, Jungeun rang the bell. It was a little weird going back to this part of town considering she'd been avoiding walking around here recently. In a matter of seconds, a girl wearing a pink sweatshirt opened the door and jumped on her.

\- Jungieeeee! - Heejin screamed.

\- Heejin please you're not 16 anymore, I can't carry you! - Jungeun warned before she collapsed, bringing them both to the floor.

\- I'm sorry. - She was laughing so hard she didn't even look like she almost hit her head on the edge of the table. - Come in, Hyunjin cooked some stuff for us.

They both went to the kitchen, finding Hyunjin wearing a dirty apron. The girl greeted Jungeun, avoiding dirtying the woman with flour. Heejin invited her to sit at the table. Nothing out of the ordinary, except Jungeun's excessive shyness.

\- But tell me, what have you been doing this time? I've heard you hardly leave your house anymore.

\- Yeah... - Jungeun thought out loud, finding her own behaviour questionable. - It's the university and some changes I made in the apartment. No big deal.

\- Jiwoo told me you'd made a new friendship. - Heejin confessed, confusing Jungeun. - You know how she is, she was jealous of you.

Jungeun didn't remember saying anything about a new friendship, just that she’d met someone. Jiwoo was quite dramatic, maybe she created a scenario in her head where Jungeun no longer wanted to be friends with her. Calling her later would be a good idea.

\- I did meet someone. - She noticed how Heejin's eyes opened in shock.

\- Who? - Heejin looked like a goofy teenager. - Is she pretty? Or him, whatever.

\- I don't know.

Jungeun said before she could even think of anything else. With a little luck, maybe Heejin wouldn't understand, but she knew how her friend could be awfully attentive when she wanted to.

\- What do you mean you don't know? Is she ugly?

\- No, I just... - Jungeun was trying to find a good excuse when she noticed an extra pair of eyes staring at her. Hyunjin quickly swerved, but it was too late. - I just don't know what she looks like.

\- Don't tell me you're dating over the internet...

\- Heejin, do you mind if we go somewhere more private? - Jungeun whispered. She wanted to tell her friend everything and was afraid of the reaction. Even worse it would be if Hyunjin thought she was crazy too. She might already be thinking she's insane.

\- Sure, come. - The girl fixed the chair and kissed Hyunjin before leaving. - We're going outside, love.

Their apartment was big. Not something exorbitant, but it certainly wasn't small. Thanks to Hyunjin's family and the music classes Heejin gave, they were able to pay for this place. The balcony was a beautiful place to stay and talk. It had a privileged view that was truly a work of art. They could see the whole city, even the small building where Jungeun lived. That view reminded her of Jinsoul, who was looking after the house while she was here.

\- What did you want to talk about?

\- It's complicated...

Heejin wasn't dumb. She knew when her friend was having a difficult time. The best thing was to respect Jungeun's time, no matter how curious she was. If she had come here, it was because she trusted Heejin. There was no reason to rush.

After so much reasoning, Jungeun realized that there was no logical explanation for what was happening. Either she would explain at once, or she would pretend that nothing had happened. Of course, Jungeun chose to tell. She could be called crazy, but at least that weight of being the only one to know that secret she would no longer carry.

\- It's about the person I met.

Heejin nodded, showing herself attentive and receptive.

\- She's not really a person. - Jungeun saw the confusion on her friend's face and tried to explain it better. - She _was_ a person.

\- So she's a ghost? Or a mutant fish?

Jungeun giggled. She knew Heejin wasn't judging her, just trying to make her feel more comfortable.

\- She's a ghost. - Jungeun confessed at once.

\- What do you mean? - Heejin asked. It seemed obvious, but it only seemed so. - You talk to a ghost? Isn't that dangerous?

\- I thought it was too. - Jungeun smiled, remembering how she met Jinsoul. - One day I was writing my essay and the battery on my computer was almost dead. She took the charger for me, but as soon as I saw that thing flying I got scared and ended up banging my head hard. She was the one who took care of me after that.

\- So not only did you become friends with a ghost, but this person takes care of you... - Heejin was assimilating things. - I only saw advantages.

\- Yes, it only has advantages. - Jungeun couldn't stop smiling when she remembered everything that happened that month. - We adopted three dogs.

\- WHAT? - For some reason, adopting three dogs seemed more surprising to Heejin than a ghost. Literally a ghost.

\- They're cute, trust me. - Jungeun calmed her friend down. - We taught them how to behave.

\- Look, to me you and this person seem to have a bigger relationship than "just friends." - Heejin teased, seeing the smile grow on Jungeun's face.

None of them had considered the obvious fate awaiting Jungeun.

\- Are you crazy? How am I going to date a ghost?

\- The same way people date on Twitter these days. - Heejin said it like it was obvious. - You haven't even told me the name of this ghost yet.

\- Jinsoul. - Her name sounded different when she said it out loud. Maybe Jungeun was getting addicted to speaking Jinsoul's name. - She's older than me.

\- Old... like 50 years? - The girl took a sip of coffee she'd picked up in the kitchen. - Don't get me wrong, I got nothing against sugar mommies.

\- NO! - Jungeun scolded, laughing. - She's 25... I mean, _she would be_.

Finally, reality seemed to hit Heejin hard. If Jinsoul was a ghost, that means she was _dead_. Jungeun was talking to someone she would never, in fact, meet. It could destroy her friend, but Heejin wouldn't be the one to do that with her friend's heart. Jungeun was happy with what she had.

\- I'm happy for you. - Heejin genuinely smiled.

For the first time in years, Heejin saw Jungeun happy with someone. Even if that someone wasn't someone. Sometimes in life, things don't go as expected, and the right thing to do is to embrace the opportunities.

\- I am afraid. - Jungeun suddenly said. - Jinsoul is such an incredible person, I never asked what happened to her on the day of her death. I think as a form of respect, you know? But there are nights I catch myself wondering if it would be different. If she were alive, we'd still be this way.

That was one of the things Heejin couldn't explain. This anguish inside her friend. Jungeun was right to say she was afraid. If the only certainty in life is death, then why was she so lost? Why was it so hard to accept?

\- Please don't tell anyone. Not even to Hyunjin, I really don't know what Jinsoul's reaction would be if she knew I was talking about her.

\- Don't worry, you can trust me. - Heejin hugged her friend. Millions of thoughts were going through her head, but it was Jungeun who mattered, and if she said it was okay, who was she to disagree with. - Now come on, let's eat what Hyunjin cooked, my baby got skillzzzzz.

  
***  
  


The visit to Heejin's house had been therapeutic. Jungeun missed going out, laughing and remembering how irresponsible they were during high school. But just as she missed it, she missed Jinsoul.

Some force of the universe pulled Jungeun to the woman so that mere hours away from her made the girl's heart shrink with longing. Knowing that she would be waiting at home helped to ease the irrational suffering. However, Jungeun still didn't understand her own feelings. There were signs indicating the danger of following this path, and she ignored them.

As she opened the door of her apartment, a fluffy, cheerful being received her with affection. Olivia was jumping on Jungeun's legs, wanting attention. It was rare for a black dog to show any emotion other than drowsiness and hunger. From the kitchen door, Choerry and Gowon seemed to race to see who got to Jungeun first.

While petting the three puppies, Jungeun heard the bell ring and soon a message was written on the board.

"How was it? :)"

\- I had forgotten how important Heejin was.- Jungeun confessed, smiling because she had finally seen her friend. - We ate a lot, her girlfriend is a great cook.

"Yeah, I know how it is," Jinsoul thought.

The woman noticed that the three dogs, although excited and full of good intentions, were not letting Jungeun stand. With the help of a new toy they had bought, Jinsoul drew their attention, bringing them to the kitchen. Jungeun still had to put her things in her room and prepare dinner.

When the girl went to see what she could cook, she noticed a package on the table and a note next to it. She hadn't made any orders, so it could only be the work of...

Jinsoul.

"I didn't know if you were coming home hungry, so I bought (actually I stole but it doesn't matter) your favourite sandwich along with your favourite juice. I hope you like it.

PS: I finished the drawing of the study room, it's on the table if you want to see it."

Jungeun faced the letter for a few seconds. She turned the paper over and folded it, bringing it closer to her heart. Her brain didn't process what she had just read. It was like a dream. One that she, unfortunately, would have to wake up soon.

How could Jinsoul be so thoughtful? Jungeun felt like she could burst into tears at any moment. The conversation she had with Heejin had another meaning now. She wanted to be able to touch Jinsoul, hug the woman and say how important she is. She _needed that_. Like it was a vital function.

Focusing on not crying, Jungeun choked in the air. As an instinct, Jinsoul came closer, unconsciously trying to hold the girl in her arms. She thought she'd done something wrong and couldn't handle the guilt of making Jungeun sad. But her hands go straight through The ghost immediately walked away, terrified. Yeah, she was still a ghost, regardless of how many lies she chose to believe.

There was a weight in this relationship. A weight that they could not control.

Jinsoul and Jungeun were so close, but so, _so far away._

Suddenly, acting like a hero, Choerry appeared in the kitchen, accidentally knocking over one of the stools. Jungeun quickly came out of her personal hell and turned to see what had happened. It was their chance to pretend that none of this had happened. Overthinking would only bring more pain, so Jinsoul went into the living room to turn on the TV.

Jungeun's stomach made some noises. To be honest, she wasn't even that hungry, but Jinsoul's cute gesture ended up creating a space in her stomach for that sandwich.

And Jinsoul stealing while thinking about her made everything better.

Jungeun took the food and went to the living room, sitting on her side of the couch. The puppies quickly arrived and soon sat on their respective places. The tradition of watching movies together would never end if it depended on Jungeun and Jinsoul. That was a moment of peace, and if it were broken, their relationship would no longer have magic. The movie itself didn't even matter, the companionship did. The silence that lasted the short 2 hours of a film was enough to take any bad feeling out of their heads.

But this time, Jinsoul had something different in mind.

One thing had been frequent every day since Jinsoul had met Jungeun. The desire to touch her. The desire to treat Jungeun as she should be treated. No matter how many sandwiches she stole, how many walks in the park they did, how many movies they watched, _one thing_ would always be missing.

The warmth.

Something so simple, but so desired by Jinsoul.

Therefore, during the time Jungeun spent away, the woman thought of a thousand alternatives until she finally came up with a solution.

One that she would put into action now.

Jinsoul went to the blackboard, taking advantage of Jungeun's distraction to write a long text. When she finished, she rang the bell. As if anticipating that she would call her, the girl looked back at the same time, surprised by the number of words.

But nothing surprised her as much as the meaning behind them.

"These last few weeks I've been thinking about something that, at least for me, is of great importance. You know that I have no choice but to write some messages, move some pillows and, of course, steal food. But I wanted to do something different. I used your Spotify account (please don't be mad) to look for some songs and I created a playlist for you. "From: Me, To: Jungeun" is the title, in case you want to know.

But what I want to tell you is that I have an invitation:

Will you dance with me?"

In a trance, Jungeun took time to process that information. Jinsoul had made a playlist for her... Jinsoul wanted to dance with her. It seemed as surreal as talking to a ghost for a month.

\- Yes. - Jungeun got up from the couch with one of the most beautiful smiles Jinsoul had ever seen in her life. And in the afterlife too. - But how are we going to do that?

"I have an idea. Wait a second."

Jinsoul ran to her room, leaving Jungeun behind. The girl didn't know what the miraculous idea in the woman's head was, but as long as they could fulfil that request, she would be happy. And it was with this thought that Jungeun saw a floating sweater enter the room.

Jinsoul's idea was simply incredible. They both knew they wouldn't be touching each other directly. But Jungeun knew that underneath that outfit was Jinsoul, the woman who, in a month, managed to give meaning to her life.

And Jinsoul knew that it was Jungeun who was touching over the fabric of her sweater, the girl who made her inexistence something less painful.

The girl who made peace exist.

It was surreal. An indescribable feeling.

Without saying anything, Jinsoul put the music on TV. Upon hearing the first chords, a smile blossomed in the corner of Jungeun's mouth. " _Ghost of You_." Jinsoul was such a fool.

But she was lucky because Jungeun was a fool for her.

The music introduced its first words while neither dared to break that moment with stupid insecurities. Jinsoul approached and positioned her arms on Jungeun's shoulder. She wore a blouse that did not cover her shoulders, allowing the feeling to be more intense. It might have been in her head, but the girl swore she could feel the warmth emanating from the woman's body.

She allowed herself to enjoy the moment without letting her thoughts get in the way. In an unconscious search for comfort, Jungeun leaned her head on Jinsoul's shoulder, noticing how something seemed to sustain her. That proved it was real. Jinsoul was real. They were real. The connection between them _could_ be real. And it was, no matter how willing life was to separate them.

Jinsoul knew that if Jungeun concentrated enough, she would notice the weight behind the lyrics. It was no accident that she had chosen that song. She knew that with each passing day they became closer and closer to the end. Jinsoul wanted to show that regardless of the future, she would always be by Jungeun's side.

She only had to think of one more thing before she left.

How to keep Jungeun's heart from breaking.

Maybe if Jinsoul could feel it, she would notice Jungeun's warm tears falling on the fabric of her blouse. It was too much to bear. Nights in clear thinking what it would be like to finally feel her hug and today that wish came true. But the heart is treacherous. To the same extent that it heals, it destroys.

They wanted each other to pay attention to specific details, not realizing that the most important one was right in front of them. They complemented each other. The search for their soulmate was over, even if they were never going to be together.

Jungeun was unaware of Jinsoul's condition. She didn't know that at any moment she could leave. For good. She knew nothing. Even so, she wanted more. She wanted to be able to escape from that reality. They were fighting a battle against an invisible enemy, one that always arrives regardless of the choices you make.

But life wouldn't be the same if we could control it.

By now, the tears were no longer silent. Jinsoul heard the little sobs coming from the little girl tucked into her arms. That hadn't been her intention, but it was good to let it out. Trying to ease Jungeun's pain, Jinsoul embraced her firmly. Soon Jungeun's hands found the pockets of her sweater and stayed like that until the last song in the playlist was over. Hugging, trying to fill the space between them until it disappeared.

She had slept in the comfort of Jinsoul's arms. Afraid to drop her, the woman carefully put Jungeun on the couch. The fact that she had cried until she was somehow defeated by tiredness broke Jinsoul's heart to pieces. If it was hard enough for her to bear it, imagine for Jungeun.

After covering her with the most comfortable blankets, Jinsoul collapsed on the sofa. She wanted to be able to scream, cry, break things, but nothing would change what was about to happen. Only one thing was able to take Jinsoul out of that vicious cycle.

Hyunjin.

Jinsoul needed help, a shoulder friend who understood her. Who could see her. And so, without a second thought, she left the apartment, checking the dogs first and, of course, Jungeun, sleeping like an angel. It was hard to leave without knowing if she was coming back. There was no goodbye manual that could help Jinsoul, it was just her and the knowledge that 26 years of life gave her.

This fuelled an anxiety that made Jinsoul get to Hyunjin's house faster. The woman knew her friend would be awake, probably having coffee on the balcony, while her girlfriend slept after marathoning animes. The ghost didn't have to say anything, she just got close and Hyunjin noticed her, opening a big smile. They missed each other.

\- I thought you' d forgotten about me. - Hyunjin joked, deep down speaking the truth.

\- Never. - Jinsoul answered, sitting on the wall. - I missed you.

Hyunjin took a sip of her coffee, waiting a few seconds before responding. Something pointed out that the girl knew an important detail, some crucial information, Jinsoul just didn't know what it was.

\- Jungeun came here today.

\- I know.

\- Heejin doesn't know I'm your friend. - Hyunjin confessed. Jinsoul didn't know what she was getting at, but she listened intently. - She doesn't know either that I heard their conversation.

Hyunjin was walking in circles. This subjectivity wouldn't take them anywhere because Jinsoul had no time for riddles. The lack of time was exactly the problem.

\- What's the matter? - Jinsoul noticed a hint of disappointment in Hyunjin's voice. The anxiety, so familiar, was returning to the woman's chest.

\- When I told you exactly one month ago that you should make Jungeun notice you, I hadn't told you to make her get attached to you. - The girl's tone had increased in volume. She sounded...hurt.

\- That's exactly what I wanted to talk to you about. - Jinsoul said, clearly sad. - I got carried away.

\- You know you're gonna destroy her heart, right? - Jinsoul was surprised at her harshness.

The way Hyunjin was addressing her, Jinsoul having done nothing about it, caused her patience to run out. A part of her said she deserved it for doing everything wrong, but not today. She came to seek support, if she wanted to find a culprit, Jinsoul would have stayed home tormenting herself.

\- Why are you acting like this? Did I do something to you? - Jinsoul screamed, tears came out of her eyes and she couldn't control it.

\- Yes! You're hurting yourself on purpose. - Hyunjin cried out. - I saw you in a hospital bed for 8 years, I saw you go from a happy girl to a lifeless body. There's no way I can go without saying anything since you've managed to kill yourself once again.

\- I didn't kill myself! - Jinsoul screamed so loudly that Hyunjin shrank, finally seeing the pain in her friend's eyes. - I never wanted to die. When I asked them to turn off the machines, I didn't know what awaited me months later. Jungeun gave me enough reason to fight, but I was so blinded by my own suffering that I gave up. I gave up, Hyun.

Hyunjin now understood where so much pain came from. Jinsoul thought she'd put herself in death row. She could tell that the machines hadn't been turned off yet, but it was wrong to give that hope now. Hyunjin couldn't say that since not even the doctors believed Jinsoul would wake up. She wouldn't tell her.

The right thing was to make Jinsoul forget Jungeun. And maybe the two of them would have a happy ending.

Or a less sad ending.

\- You didn't give up, Soul. - Hyunjin felt like she was going to suffocate at any moment. - You're one of the strongest persons I know. Jungeun thinks so too. I heard her say that to Heejin.

\- What did she say? - Jinsoul seemed to back off a bit when she heard Jungeun's name mentioned.

\- She said you adopted three puppies. - A sad smile appeared for a few seconds on Jinsoul's face. - And that she wondered if it would have been different. If you'd still be as you are if you were alive.

At that point, they were both a mess. Tears never ceased and a burn inside Jinsoul's chest didn't seem to want to go away. It was to be expected.

\- I can't do that to her. - Jinsoul thought out loud.

\- As late as it is, I think you should talk to her.

It was the first time in 8 years that Hyunjin saw Jinsoul in this state. The woman had empty eyes and, no matter how dead she was, had never been as lifeless as she is now. _This was death_. Losing your will to live before you even lost your life.

Jungeun had been her life until now. It made sense to lose your soul when your life had been brutally taken away from you by the impasses the universe had created. Among all the great decisions in her lifetime, Jinsoul had participated in none. And when she had the chance, she was impulsive and selfish.

She had no right to fuck with another great story. She needed to leave.

\- I think that's enough for today. - Jinsoul commented, taking a deep breath. She felt more tired than usual. - It was nice talking to you.

\- Jinsoul. - Hyunjin called her friend.

\- Hm?

\- I love you. - Hyunjin shed a single tear. - I'll never give up on you. You're my big sister.

Among all her wishes, all Jinsoul had left was to answer with a low "I love you too" and leave. Another empty goodbye. Without the chance to hug her like they did 8 years ago. Without the opportunity to punch Hyunjin in the shoulder like they did 8 years ago.

If only she could change what happened 8 years ago.

Jinsoul caught herself wandering through town the same way she had done a month ago. She hadn't found enough reason to go out looking for nothing in the streets, as she had already found her everything inside that apartment. Today, however, was the day she would leave everything behind, and return to the beginning, where it all started.

Searching for nothingness.

Jungeun was a girl. No, a woman. A young woman, with her whole life ahead of her. It was selfish to hold her to a ghost. To a ghost of a woman who no longer had a future. They had different goals. While Jungeun wanted to be able to marry and have children, Jinsoul lived another day with her body trapped in a hospital bed. Jungeun deserved someone who existed. And not Jinsoul.

Days and days thinking about what was that void that had suddenly disappeared with Jungeun's presence. All those dawns watching the girl sleeping to understand only today what that feeling of peace was about. It was love.

What Jinsoul felt was love.

But like in great romantic novels, love is not always what we wanted it to be.

Love is freedom. Love is happiness. What kind of love would that be if Jinsoul imprisoned Jungeun?

Arriving at the apartment, Jinsoul was greeted with three little tails wagging. She would miss Olivia, Choerry and Gowon. The puppies she had found in one of her aimless adventures. Funny to think how these three puppies had gotten in the way and, luckily, Jinsoul had someone like Jungeun to look after them.

As much as Jinsoul wanted to play with them until exhaustion took over, she had a mission. Her last mission.

Jungeun was on the couch. Lying there, breathing calmly, with an expression so serene that Jinsoul could swear to be an angel there, not a human being. This image reminded her of the day she had taken the courage to finally get Jungeun's attention. It seemed as if it had been yesterday that the girl had become frightened by the napkin, or the charger. It looked like yesterday Jinsoul had put a child's bandage on Jungeun's forehead.

There it was, the bitter taste of longing.

And she hadn't even said goodbye yet.

Jinsoul sat on the couch next to Jungeun, taking a look around. The blackboard she used to communicate with. The pillow she used to play with the dogs and even to beat Jungeun just to hear her laugh. Good times.

Damn, she sounded like an old woman.

There were so many things she would miss, it was not possible to choose just one. The movies on television. Usually, Jungeun slept on Jinsoul's lap and she always had to turn everything off by herself and put the girl to sleep. Jinsoul pretended it to be a burden, but she loved to see the girl so vulnerable. They trusted each other deeply.

And Jinsoul was about to break Jungeun's trust.

The tears once again came back with force. There was no longer a reason to fight the pain. She just accepted and suffered quietly. She deserved to suffer. If only she could touch Jungeun, kiss her goodbye. Write a letter, maybe.

It was a good idea. Write a letter that would be registered forever. That's if Jungeun didn't throw it away in a fit of rage. Jinsoul did it. Luckily, the tears that fell couldn't get the sheet of paper wet.

It was only a few minutes till 3 in the morning. Jungeun would wake up in 2 hours. That means Jinsoul had 2 hours to see, for the last time, the woman she loved.

Yes, she loved her. She had no reason to deny it.

And so the two hours passed. With a few minutes left, Jinsoul carefully folded the letter and put it on the coffee table. Even though it was useless, it was her wish. One last wish.

They were so many “last things” that Jinsoul didn't even know if there would be one last day left in her afterlife. If it all ended today, it would be easier.

With the sunlight entering through the gaps in the curtain, Jinsoul bent down and kissed Jungeun. A kiss that neither of the two would feel, but the explosions inside Jinsoul's heart were there. Were real.

  
***  
  


Something wet was, of course, wetting Jungeun's face. She woke up a bit lost. The cry of the previous night had given her a little headache, nothing to worry about. Noticing the responsible for the wet good morning, Jungeun smiled. Olivia was awake and seemed very excited.

\- Good morning... - Jungeun yawned.

It was like a ritual. She woke up, wished good morning to Jinsoul, who had been up all night, and the two of them would go for coffee. Sometimes in the cafeteria, sometimes in the apartment. Always together.

After a few seconds, she noticed that Jinsoul hadn't answered. The bell hadn't rung, much less the blackboard had any written message.

"Maybe she went out to get food," Jungeun thought.

Even if Jinsoul always picked up food before she woke up, the girl believed something had happened halfway through. Some employee had finally gotten angry about the ghost robberies, or she had stopped to feed the ducks.

She thought of all this. Until she noticed a folded sheet on the table.

\- What...

Jungeun wasn’t prepared for impact. In her innocence, she thought it would be another one of Jinsoul's funny or cute messages.

But not a farewell letter.

"Good morning :)

First, I would like to say that your coffee is already on the table. I took everything I had from the bakery. I think this time I really gave them a loss, but don't worry I'll find a way to fix it.

You're probably wondering why I wrote this letter.

I don't know either. I shouldn't have done anything I did.

Don't get me wrong, please, I don't regret anything. This one and a half months I've been by your side have been the best in my whole life. And when I say life, I'm really talking about life. The one that starts with your birth and ends... well, ends now.

I never told you, and you never asked. But my situation was never good. In case you didn't know, I had an accident eight years ago. I've been in a coma ever since. The doctors say I have no hope, that I won't wake up. And I didn't wake up.

The problem is, one hour, my heart will stop beating, the coma will end and I'll wake up. Only somewhere else. And I wanted to say goodbye. And thank you.

You're amazing. Never stop being who you are. Never stop cooking the incredible dishes that you and only you can do. Never stop being a dedicated student, I'm sure you'll be a great professional. Take care of Choerry, Gowon and Olivia. I think Olivia will miss me more, but I know they all love me :)

And please don't cry.

You deserve someone who can love you right, someone who can touch you. Take you on dates, teach you to feed ducks without being attacked by them. Someone you can teach how to cook because I'm horrible at it.

But one thing I know I'm good at.

_In loving you._

I love you, Kim Jungeun. And know that even if you hate me after this letter, I'll still love you from up there (or down there, you never know).

Take care. Drink the coffee I brought you and please, live life intensely.

Love, Jinsoul."

At the end of the letter, Jungeun had her vision completely blurred. The tears, besides wetting the paper, soaked her sweater. The sweater Jinsoul had worn the night before. It didn't look real. Jungeun wanted it not to be real. It was just a nightmare, she thought. But how could it be fake if she could touch it?

Although she never touched Jinsoul and she was the most real thing that ever happened in her life.

The headache increased. Jungeun had lost the course of her day. Maybe even life. But Jinsoul's words echoed in her head.

\- How dare you say I would hate you, Jinsoul? - Jungeun said, staring at the letter with a sad smile. - I love you. And I will enjoy life. _For us._

With that said, Jungeun went to the kitchen. As she ate her favourite sandwich and drank her favourite juice, she let out a giggle.

That was a letter of goodbye, but for Jungeun, it could be a Love Letter too.


	5. ...Unpredictable.

The first few days dragged on. The hours didn't pass, the sun wasn't so warm anymore. The village once so lived, seemed to have lost its colours. Jungeun knew she was doing the opposite of what Jinsoul had asked, but it was difficult. It was hard to return to a normal life, as she had before. She didn't like that life.

Choerry, Gowon and Olivia missed Jinsoul. Olivia was not as happy as before, not even music could cheer up the puppy. Choerry always had her tail between her legs and her head down. Gowon wasn’t so excited when she received food. Jungeun tried to change that, take them for a walk, but what good was it? They all missed Jinsoul.

Some weekends she tried to go out with Jiwoo. She finally met that woman her friend wanted her to meet. Sooyoung. Tall, short hair, dancer and abnormally gorgeous. Jungeun tried to talk, keep a good look so no one would notice that deep down she was shattered. She couldn't show her sadness, otherwise, people would suspect it. 

For days Jungeun woke up and tried to say something to see if Jinsoul had come back. But nothing happened. At some point, the blackboard was kept inside the locker that Jinsoul had helped to build. She should forget. But Jinsoul's memory was all she had left. Along with all the other items in the house that were the woman's trademark.

Two weeks had passed. 

Two weeks had passed since Jungeun had read the goodbye letter. The same one she rereads every night to remember how special Jinsoul was. It was masochistic of her to hold on so tight to a piece of paper to have the slightest desire to get out of bed and start the day. If she could describe Jinsoul, she would say the woman was her strength. For everything. It was useless to try to fill the space she filled with other things or other people.

Jungeun would be graduating in a few months. Graduating in music. And her final job was to write a song. 

Inspiration was not lacking. But her body wouldn't allow it. Countless pages of her notebook went to the garbage, soaked by the tears shed during the process. Jungeun wanted to write something that would immortalize Jinsoul. After all, that's what she wanted it to be. Eternal. 

And here she was. Smashing another sheet of paper.

The songs Jinsoul had selected for the playlist had been the soundtrack Jungeun used to endure the days. If she concentrated enough, she could remember the day they danced in the room, under the moonlight and nothing else. It had been the first time she had touched Jinsoul. 

\- Why? - Jungeun said at a low volume, like a confession. - Why is it so hard? It shouldn't be like this. 

Looking at the table, she noticed a folded paper, a bit old. So many times she opened and closed that letter, the paper was slowly wearing away. Jungeun had to be more careful. 

\- You are so cliché...- Jungeun laughed sadly, softly rubbing her fingertips on the words written by Jinsoul.- Everything went away with you, Jinsoul. What was left was this love letter...

Maybe Jungeun was really coming to some end. And when all the cycles close, others begin. And so, Jungeun began her newest composition. 

***

\- Baby, why are you like this? 

It was a Saturday afternoon. The city, little by little, was stopping, resting. People would go to their homes to see their loved ones again. For many, it was a beautiful moment. The sun having colours different from its traditional yellow. The sky making room for a beautiful moon to take over the role of guardian. It was the end of a day, and the bad emotions were gone along with the last remnants of the sun.

But some brought their uncertainties home. 

\- Like what? - Hyunjin answered, looking into the eyes of her love.

\- I don't know... Weird? - Heejin sat on Hyunjin's lap. - The phone rings and you seem to have an allergy to it. I've never seen you like this, my love, what happened? 

Hyunjin sighed, looking away. She wasn't able to keep eye contact with Heejin knowing she was lying. She was betraying her girlfriend's trust. 

The truth was that Hyunjin was afraid. Two weeks since Jinsoul had come to her house and they had argued. Two weeks she had seen her friend for the last time. No, for the _second last time._

It wasn't easy to have to say goodbye so many times to someone she loved. 

Hyunjin had gone to the hospital last week. The doctors released her to go to Jinsoul's room. The woman slept serenely, with no sign of the tragic accident that put her in that bed. This was one of the few moments when Hyunjin allowed herself to cry. Of sadness, of pain, of longing, of anger. 

So many emotions and yet nothing could change that. 

She had gone to the hospital in the hope that Jinsoul would wake up. It wasn't normal for the woman's spirit to suddenly disappear like that. Or she had woken up.

Or she had died. 

In both situations, the doctors would have called. 

But nobody called. 

Therefore, Hyunjin never went to the hospital again. She had given up being selfish. If Jinsoul had said that she wanted to forget, that she wanted that suffering to end, Hyunjin would grant her this wish. No more making decisions for her, it was time to make her last decision in the right way.

The deadline for the machines to be turned off was Sunday. 

Tomorrow. 

A cycle would close tomorrow. 

On one side of town, Jungeun spent sleepless nights holding on to a hint of hope that Jinsoul would return. 

On the other side, Hyunjin was waiting for her sister to finally rest. 

It was not easy to know that her great friend of so many years would cease to exist in a few hours. Hyunjin was suffering. A lot. And Heejin knew it. 

\- I need to tell you something. 

Heejin nodded, coming out of her girlfriend's lap to sit on the couch. Hyunjin's voice sounded empty. A chill went through Heejin's body. It wasn't normal. 

\- You know your friend Jungeun? - Heejin nodded again. - I don't know her as well as you do, but I know what you talked about that day. 

\- What do you mean? 

\- What I mean is that... - Hyunjin took a break, looking for the right words. - I know Jinsoul. 

Heejin's reaction was pure shock. Jinsoul was a ghost, a woman who died. How did Hyunijn know her? 

\- We were friends. I was there the day of the accident. - Hyunjin felt tears forming in the corner of her eyes. Talking about her friend would never be easy. - She's not dead yet. She's in an irreversible coma. I'm the one that kept her alive all these years through machines. 

\- Hyunjin I... - Heejin was tearing up. She'd never seen her girlfriend so broken. - And Jungeun? Does she know that? Can you talk to Jinsoul too?

\- Jinsoul asked me. - Hyunjin felt her throat burning. - She told me she wanted the suffering to end. If she had no hope, why go on? So I talked to the doctors...

\- No...

\- They'll finish turning off the equipment tomorrow afternoon. 

The tears came through and took over. Heejin sobbed. She barely knew Jinsoul and knew that was not a happy ending. How Jungeun would be... She had no idea. This wasn't about Heejin, it was about Jungeun and Jinsoul. Two people who did nothing to anyone and yet had their requests denied. 

Hyunjin's gesture was altruistic. She suffered because she couldn't save her friend, couldn't have done anything now or eight years ago. Heejin felt weak. Powerless. Unconsciously, the girl hugged her girlfriend. Hyunjin trembled and grabbed Heejin's sweatshirt. 

Being human is about this. Living without knowing anything, but having to accept everything. To look for answers without ever finding them.

***

Sunday. 

Jungeun woke up apathetic. She had given up reliving the routine she had before. She barely had a black coffee without sugar and headed for the study room. College work, endless. Did it make any difference? Absolutely not. But she put on music. Maybe filling the void with sounds could make Jungeun feel less alone. 

It was a Sunday. _The_ Sunday. 

But she didn't know. 

Minutes went by and a bang happened. On the wall, a small hole formed with the impact of the notebook. Tears fell on the table. Jungeun had reached her limit, there was no more room inside her to bear the sadness. Everything reminded her of Jinsoul.

She decided to go out. 

In the small village, too early for any movement, Jungeun remembered what she preferred to forget. The ducks, the smell of fresh bread and some people opening their shops. The cafeteria was no longer robbed. And, incredible as it may seem, Jungeun thought she saw a sad expression on the employee's face. Maybe even she missed seeing food floating in the air.

Jinsoul turned anyone's day into something good, unexpected. She brought colour and made people have something more to tell and live for. The irony of not being able to do it for herself, but not refusing to do it for the other. 

The village atmosphere was a good thing. Calm. It helped calm Jungeun's obsessive thoughts. The girl spent the day walking aimlessly, getting to know new places, exploring. For the first time, she had followed Jinsoul's advice. 

To enjoy. 

And she enjoyed it. Jungeun allowed herself to spend money on several different foods. She fed the ducks. She even laughed. At every moment, her head was thinking of one person. A person who would be happy to see her like that, leaving the sadness aside for a few hours. 

The clock was almost announcing three in the afternoon. 

Jungeun was happy. For her. For them. 

On the other side, Hyunjin was learning to deal with the misfortunes of life. 

Heejin held her girlfriend's hand tight, showing that she was not alone. In the room, only they and two doctors were having the honour of watching Jinsoul sleep. There was only an hour left before the deadline. Eight years summarized in one hour. 

\- I don't know if I can stay here. - Hyunjin whispered in Heejin's ear. 

\- Stay. But if you feel bad, I can go with you. 

\- I'm sorry to interrupt, but we have to start the proceedings. Will you stay? - One of the doctors approached to communicate the warning. 

He had seen many families lose their loved ones before. But to see such a young couple have to say goodbye to an equally young woman was heartbreaking. He was the doctor who took care of Jinsoul for these 8 years and to see this story end like this, sad as it is, is soothing. 

Jinsoul would not suffer anymore. 

Hyunjin gave an affirmative sign, seeing the doctors start the procedure. A lonely tear fell on the girl's pale face. She wanted to be able to hug her friend. But to be kicked out from the hospital just now was certainly not good. 

\- Turning off the equipment... - The assistant doctor reported it.

At that point, Hyunjin felt her head was light. As if she could faint at any moment. She could have sworn she was hallucinating when she saw Jinsoul slowly open her eyes. Hyunjin's wish was, unfortunately, coming true inside her head. A sick joke.

\- Hyun... - Heejin called, nudging her girlfriend's arm. - Hyun I think...

\- Wait a minute. - The doctor held the assistant's arm, preventing him from pushing the button that would turn the equipment off. 

The man took a small lantern and approached Jinsoul's body. The vital signs were still the same, but a small variation in heartbeat alerted everyone in the room.

\- I'm not hallucinating? - Hyunjin sobbed. - Please, if I'm hallucinating I don't know if I can take it anymore. 

\- No, honey, you're not. I saw it too. - Heejin smiled in tears, kissing her girlfriend lovingly. 

\- One second. - The doctor said before he finally tested to see if anyone in that room was on drugs. 

Everyone had seen Jinsoul move. Not just a spasm. 

Until the woman's heart began to beat more intensely. 

And her eyes finally opened. 

\- Oh, my God. - Hyunjin couldn't stop crying. It felt like a dream. - Jinsoul? 

After eight years in a coma, Jinsoul was extremely weak. Calling her sister's name would have no effect, but who said you need to talk to communicate? 

In non-verbal communication, Jinsoul was a master. 

Her eyes searched for the owner of the voice so familiar inside that room, and soon Jinsoul noticed Hyunjin's presence. No one seemed to believe it. Not even the doctors. If Jinsoul had woken up, it was certainly a miracle. There was no prediction that the girl would be able to beat the coma. 

\- We need you two to leave. - The doctor said in despair. 

\- No, I'm not leaving. My friend woke up, she's alive. - Hunjin replied, clearly angry.

What kind of sick joke was that? She wouldn't say goodbye to Jinsoul for the third time. 

\- Please. - The man begged, leaving aside his posture as a doctor. - I know how hard it is to turn your back just now but trust us. 

Heejin didn't know whether to defend her girlfriend or obey the doctor. They both seemed to be right, but she certainly didn't want Hyunjin to be kicked out by security guards. 

\- Baby, come on. - Heejin lovingly pulled Hyunjin's arm. - She's fine, she'll be fine. 

\- Just tell me if she has a chance. - Hyunjin demanded it. 

The man knew what she wanted. But unfortunately, he couldn't promise. 

\- We'll do our best. 

***  
  


Jungeun watched the sunset by the lake. Vivid memories of her and Jinsoul's walks in this very place were now a reason for happiness. She laughed. Jinsoul had taken her on countless dates. Now she knew of the second intentions behind them. They were fools for each other, and Jungeun regretted a little that she had not accepted that they were a couple. 

Because if love was mutual, there was no reason not to label it. They were a couple. 

The ducklings were swimming peacefully in the calm waters illuminated by the warm, welcoming sunlight. Several happy adjectives and it seemed her heart had understood the message.

The old empty heart was now full. Filled with good memories. 

It was time to return home. 

She walked at a slow pace, enjoying paying attention to things around her. The contrast of the village was interesting. In the morning, things seemed to be waking up. In the afternoon, things were getting ready to rest. Unlike Jungeun, who felt more alive than ever. 

It was already night. And she didn't feel like sleeping. 

So Jungeun headed for the cafeteria. That special cafeteria she avoided passing by for so long. Maybe for fear that the employee would think she was the one stealing. It didn't make sense, but for Jungeun it did a little. Actually, the fear was that she would accidentally start crying. It was a habit Jungeun developed. Crying whenever Jinsoul got into her head. 

Today, on the other hand, Jungeun wanted to remember. 

\- Hi. - She said, drawing the employee's attention.

There were only the two of them inside that cosy place. Jungeun didn't know if she was bothering her, but she seemed happy to see her presence. 

\- Hello! How are you? 

The girl was short and wearing a dark green apron. She had a bob cut and small eyes. In general, she was very pretty. Jungeun immediately felt comfortable in her presence. As if she had a happy aura. 

\- I'm fine. I really am. - Jungeun noticed that her response may have sounded a little weird, but the smile the girl opened removed any insecurity from her chest. 

\- That's very good. I'm glad you're okay. - She smiled. Jungeun liked that smile. - What do you wanna order? 

\- Hm, a latte with vanilla essence. 

\- You got it! - The employee turned and quickly swerved, drawing Jungeun's attention. - My name is Haseul. And I wanted to say that you look very pretty when you're happy. Be happy more often, the world gets prettier. 

Before Jungeun could say her name, Haseul entered the kitchen. The girl's speech impacted Jungeun. It didn't sound like a flirtation, but a compliment. Jungeun found it curious how Haseul seemed to know exactly what was happening and what to say. If it was a marketing move, well, Jungeun would say they had a good marketing team. 

A vibration in her pocket changed her line of thought. 

Someone was calling her.

On the display, the unknown number confused her. Should she answer it? 

\- Hello? - Jungeun said, apprehensive. 

- _Jungeun, it's me, Heejin._

\- Oh, hi! How are you? - Jungeun smiled immediately. - Did something happen? 

\- _I'm at the hospital with Hyunjin._ \- Heejin explained. - _Nothing happened to us._

\- Then why are you there? - Jungeun thought it was funny, but was slightly worried. 

\- _Something happened, something I thought was right to tell you._ \- Heejin couldn't explain it. Smacking herself in the head, the girl continued. - _It's a long story, but I need you to come here. We're at the hospital downtown._

Without leaving a gap for Jungeun to answer, Heejin hung up. 

\- Here's your order, Mademoiselle! - Haseul put the coffee on the table. It' had been so well prepared that Jungeun felt sorry to have to leave it behind. - Did something happen? 

\- I do not know. I must go there to find out. - Jungeun was visibly lost.

Haseul noticed.

\- No need to pay, it's on the house. Go see what happened. - She smiled kindly. - When you can, come back here. This coffee is too good for you not to enjoy. 

\- Thank you, Haseul. - Jungeun was leaving when she remembered something. - By the way, my name is Jungeun. 

***

With her nerves on the edge, Jungeun entered the hospital disoriented. The trip to the place was certainly one of the most stressful things she has ever experienced in her life. Worse still, Heejin hadn't even given a hint of what had happened. Of course, Jungeun's mind had thought horrible things. 

\- Miss, can I help you? - The hospital receptionist spoke, drawing the girl's attention. 

\- Yes, I'm looking for...

\- She's with me. 

Heejin appeared behind a door, alone. Jungeun remembered her saying Hyunjin was with her, but so far no sign of the girl. It served as fuel for more things to happen inside the woman's head. 

\- Excuse me, but I need to know your name to release your entry. 

\- No problem. - Jungeun took the document out of her pocket and placed it on the counter. - I'll come by to pick it up again later, sorry but I'm in a hurry. 

The receptionist, blonde and with a soft voice, was left with no reaction. She wouldn't forbid Jungeun to come in, something in her said it would be better to let her go. 

Heejin took Jungeun's hand and walked at a slow pace through the corridors of the hospital. The silence was bothering her too much, she needed an answer, an explanation, whatever. Just a reason for her heart to calm down.

\- Heejin, stop. - Jungeun stopped in the hallway. - Tell me what happened, I feel like I'm going to faint at any moment. 

Heejin seemed just as lost as she did. It was a mess, all so impulsive and purely emotional.

\- Look, I don't know if I can talk much, Hyunjin doesn't know you're here. 

\- Then why did you call me, for God's sake?! 

\- I thought it was right. - Heejin blurted out, more cryptic than necessary. 

\- I won't move until you tell me. 

She was at a dead end. Heejin didn't know what to do. She'd called her friend on an impulse and just realized the mistake she'd made when Jungeun was already on her way to the hospital. A mess that could have been avoided if she hadn't been so intuitive.

It was right to say that Jinsoul was alive. It was wrong to say that Jinsoul was alive. The doctors made it very clear that the woman's situation was critical, that she could return to a coma or die, in the worst case. Heejin didn't know what had happened for her to feel so much need to call Jungeun. She felt it was her right to know that Jinsoul was alive. 

Heejin didn't know about the tragic ending of their relationship.

\- I'm leaving. - Jungeun said before she turned her back to Heejin.

\- No! Please. 

She had one question left. One that would say whether she should stay or leave and go back to the life that after so much struggle she finally learned to appreciate.

\- Heejin, _is this about Jinsoul?_

The girl swallowed dry. 

\- That's it, I'm leaving. 

Heejin stood in the middle of the hall. Divided between going after Jungeun and possibly breaking her heart even more, or not going after her and making her miss the chance to meet Jinsoul. There were two scenarios with horrible endings. Why? Why did everything have to be so complicated?

Standing still wouldn't change anything. Heejin, then, ran. She ran down the hall, past the reception desk, watching the receptionist's face squirm in a thousand different emotions. Finally, Heejin found Jungeun sitting on a bench in front of the hospital. The moon was already in the sky. Everything was black if it wasn't for the lamp posts illuminating the street. And more.

It was raining. 

Jungeun was sitting in the rain, crying.

\- Jungie. - Heejin called in a soft voice.

\- No Heejin. - She whispered, her voice cracking. - She meant a lot to me. She still means a lot to me. I can't live with this false hope, I can't. For God's sake, I'm 23 years old. Why did this happen to me? 

Fearless of the rain, Heejin sat next to her friend, feeling her shirt stick to her body. It was cold. 

\- I'm sorry. - Heejin stroked Jungeun's back.

\- It's ridiculous to think it's only been three months. - She laughed at her own misfortune. - In 90 days I managed to fall in love with a dead woman I'll never meet. I don't even know what she looks like. Just brief descriptions that Jinsoul made of her appearance, that's all. 

\- It's been half a year, Jungie. - Heejin confessed, seeing her friend quickly turn to face her. - Jinsoul has known you for a year. She just didn't have the guts to talk to you.

Jungeun collapsed in tears. 

Jinsoul was an idiot. An idiot to have taken Jungeun away all that time. 

\- I wanted it to be different. That I could see her for real, even for a few seconds. I don't care. It's this uncertainty that destroys me, this void that doesn't go away. 

Thinking of what to answer, Heejin was stopped by a scream. Hyunjin had come out in the rain after her. Soon the doctors were outside with them, and the receptionist was there too. She was short and looked very tired.

\- For God's sake, can you stop running? This is a hospital. 

\- Not now, Yeojin. - Hyunjin begged, seeming to know the girl. - Heejin, love, they...

Even far away, Jungeun noticed Hyunjin's eyes stopping over hers. And the whole world seemed to have frozen. They were the only ones who knew Jinsoul. It was as if only Jungeun understood Hyunjin's pain, and only Hyunjin understood Jungeun's pain. In this exchange of glances and quiet messages, they found comfort. They had so much to tell each other, but Hyunjin had the most important message. 

Finally, _this story had come to an end._

\- Heejin, why is she here? 

\- I... I called her. - Heejin got up from the bank, feeling guilty. - I'm sorry. 

\- I'm not mad, my love. - Hyunjin ran to her girlfriend, kissing her. - I can never be mad at you. You did the right thing.

Jungeun just listened to the two of them talking, smiling with melancholy. They were the perfect example of what she wanted to be with Jinsoul. Several jokes told by the Universe, none of which made Jungeun laugh. 

\- Can we come in? - The doctor asked. - I have news.

The man's speech made Heejin freeze. The girl looked at her girlfriend, looking for any sign that everything was okay. However, she found only a pair of red eyes and a swollen face from all that crying. 

\- It all came to an end. - Hyunjin whispered. - It's done for good. 

***

Jungeun was running. She ran like never before. 

She finally knew the whole truth. Hyunjin was in charge of telling everything since the day of the accident. Heejin just listened, crying because of her friend's reaction. When she found out about the coma, Jungeun cried like a child. Jinsoul had already told her about it. But very little, to spare her heart. When Hyunjin told the details and the story behind Jinsoul's spirit, however, it brought her down.

And now she was running towards room L-7. 

\- Miss, I ask you to wait outside. - The assistant asked, holding the door. 

Hyunjin appeared right behind Jungeun with a mixed expression of sadness and anger. 

\- I waited 8 years, she waited for 1. - Hyunjin explained, looking deep into that man's eyes. - Don't ask us to wait, please. 

Seeming to understand - and a little intimidated - the man slowly opened space. As he opened the door, Jungeun felt as if a weight was coming off her back. 

Jinsoul was lying there. Sleeping. The roles had finally changed, and Jungeun was the one who thought she was seeing an angel in front of her. She looked so calm. She was so beautiful. It was possible to fall in love with the same person for a second time, and Jungeun was here to prove it.

\- Jinsoul... - Jungeun whispered. She felt like pronouncing that name in vain was some kind of sin, so she said only for herself. 

Hyunjin and Heejin watched from the door. They were meeting. Connecting as it should have been since the first moment. Jungeun was afraid to touch Jinsoul and break the woman, she looked so fragile. 

But what Jungeun wished to be eternal was cut off by the doctor's entrance into the room. The girl held Jinsoul's hand calmly, feeling in the clouds for finally touching the hand of the woman she loved.

Yes, Jungeun loved Jinsoul. 

\- We... - The man choked on his speech. - We have news. 

Hyunjin sat on the bench, afraid the ground might be pulled out from under her at any moment. Heejin stood next to her girlfriend, holding her. She wouldn't let anything in this world hurt her love. 

Jungeun, on the other hand, was a mixture of fear and happiness.

Happiness for holding the hand of the love of her life. 

Fear for having Jinsoul's fate in the hands of the doctor in front of her. 

\- As you know, Miss Jung Jinsoul had an accident eight years ago and has been in a coma ever since. - He introduced, seeming uncertain on how to say the rest. - Today, she showed different vital signs and seemed to wake up. Her case, until then, was considered irreversible. However, her situation was critical. 

At that moment, Hyunjin and Jungeun were no longer holding back their tears. Frighteningly, words could destroy more lives than death itself. 

\- _Unfortunately_ , two high-risk surgeries were necessary. - The doctor paused, looking at Jungeun's hand holding Jinsoul's. - Miss Jung Jinsoul managed to get through both successfully. 

Hyunjin let out a loud sigh of relief. Both were holding their breath so hard that it was possible to see Jungeun's face turn red. Heejin cried. The doctors had their eyes watering, happy to witness a story that fortunately had a happy ending. 

\- But she still has to stay in the hospital. - He warned. - After all this time, she needs to have physical therapy for a long time. Other than that, congratulations. Your friend is fine, by a miracle of science. 

Tired of holding herself, Jungeun hugged Jinsoul's warm body, avoiding squeezing too hard. The doctor warned that in a few hours they would reduce the amount of medicine and Jinsoul would wake up. 

***

Hyunjin and Heejin, having spent the whole day in the hospital, thought it was best to go home and rest. The day had been extremely exhausting, and Heejin needed to take care of her girlfriend. Jungeun decided to stay. She asked Jiwoo to look after Choerry, Gowon and Olivia. The girl was happy with the news, knowing that she could see her friend sooner.

During this time she spent in the hallway waiting for the doctors' release to enter the room, Jungeun kept scrolling through her cellphone. It had been a while since she had been on social media to see how the life of the people she loved was going. Now that her life seemed to have settled down, she could see how other people's lives were.

Jiwoo was in a curious relationship with the girl that Jungeun had talked to, Sooyoung. Haseul, as incredible as it sounds, had found her in Instagram. Jungeun saw that the woman had a girlfriend named Vivi, which happened to be the owner of the café where she worked. They seemed very close and quite sweet. 

Everyone was happy and Jungeun could finally be included in that list. 

\- Miss... Kim Jungeun? - A nurse showed up in front of her, holding a clipboard. 

\- Yes, that's me. 

\- I'm here to talk about your girlfriend, Jung Jinsoul. 

Jungeun blushed, embarrassed.

\- She's not my girlfriend. 

The nurse looked at the clipboard, looked at her, and made a confused face. Certainly, that was Heejin's fault. 

\- Strange, a relative named Jeon Heejin said you were Jung Jinsoul's girlfriend. - She checked the file. - Anyway, you can go to the room now. We'll fix her bed in the meantime. 

It was happening. 

Months of talking to her and, in a matter of seconds, she would actually hear her voice. It was a feeling from another world. The suffering was no longer her personal hell. She had learned to be a strong person. But her greatest source of strength, her safe harbour, was less than a meter from her. As the door slowly opened, flashes of memories went through Jungeun's head. The day Jinsoul had taken care of her wound, the day they adopted the puppies... 

And now she was there. 

Jungeun entered the room in silence, afraid to do anything wrong. She noticed that Jinsoul was already awake, but couldn't see her at the door. The moment the nurse lifted the woman so she could sit, Jungeun made eye contact with her.

The device that measured Jinsoul's heartbeat began to make loud noises. She was equally moved to see Jungeun. A great surprise. And a great view to wake up after almost dying.

\- I'll leave you two alone, anything you need just push the red button on the side of the bed. - The nurse said before she left and closed the door.

Silence filled the room. 

It was a good silence. A silence where Jungeun and Jinsoul looked at each other, analyzed each other. Jungeun saw how beautiful Jinsoul was, her blonde hair fell on her shoulders and even without make-up the woman was extremely perfect. 

Jinsoul, on the other hand, thought about what her first words would be. But Jungeun seemed to have noticed the woman's insecurity, as she spoke first. 

\- Do you remember me? 

A smile came over Jinsoul's face. How could she forget the woman who changed her life? 

\- Kim Jungeun, a music major, is a great cook and has a loud friend named Jiwoo. - Jinsoul said slowly, seeing how the girl cried. - I wouldn't forget you even if someone ripped my brain out. 

Jungeun walked towards her and, without much thought, touched Jinsoul's face with her fingertips. What used to be words, now was the warm, soft skin of the woman she loved. Words were never necessary for their relationship. They served as complements because love itself was in the actions. And now, in the eyes.

\- How are Choerry, Olivia and Gowon? - Jinsoul asked, not being able to simply watch the girl burst into tears. She had to make her smile. - Please don't cry, this time I can't move things and bring a tissue for you.

Jungeun laughed in tears. 

\- They are fine. - She dried her tears with the sleeve of her sweater. - And at least you won't steal anymore.

\- Too bad... I had just one more thing I wanted to steal... - Jinsoul smirked.

Jungeun's face was so, so close to her that she could feel the warm breath against her skin.

\- What? - The girl held the woman's thin, delicate face, looking deep into her eyes. 

\- A kiss from you. - Jinsoul whispered, feeling the delicate touches on her jaw. So intimate.

\- You are so cheesy, Jung Jinsoul... - Jungeun giggled, coming closer and closer. - What if I told you that you stole my heart? 

\- Then we'd be two. - Jinsoul closed her eyes, speaking lower in fear that the world would hear and spoil this moment. - I love you. I don't know if this is the right moment, but I love you, Kim Jungeun. 

\- You know... I like the way you write. But I think your voice is my favourite new thing. - Jungeun also closed her eyes, feeling Jinsoul's nose lightly touch hers. - I love you, Jung Jinsoul. 

And with that, the last robbery happened. 

Jungeun felt Jinsoul's soft, warm lips against hers. There was no one but them. A slow hand climbed up and rested on Jungeun's neck, intensifying the kiss. The connection between them had reached its ultimate point. The spiritual and physical love, all that the ancient poets most craved, they had only for themselves. Jinsoul felt her lung scream for air, but she would not die. Jungeun was her life, and while she was kissing her, nothing bad could happen.

The kiss ended with little pecks. Jungeun could feel Jinsoul smiling even when her eyes were closed. There were so many things they wanted to do. Jungeun wanted to sing the song she wrote for Jinsoul. Jinsoul wanted to hug her woman during movie nights and never let go, not even if Olivia bit her. They wanted to make love in the bedroom that Jinsoul spent countless hours watching Jungeun sleep, wondering how it would feel to have her body against hers. 

They knew it would take time and patience until Jinsoul could return to the apartment, but that was the least of it. 

As long as they were together, things would be right. Because each life had a purpose, and their purpose was to _be together_ , regardless of everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I saw a quote on twitter today and I think it fits perfectly in this story.
> 
> “Just because the past is painful doesn't mean the future will be.” (it’s from Meet the Robinsons btw)
> 
> Please tell me what you think. I might write a sequel, like a bonus chapter, to show how Jungeun and Jinsoul are doing. 
> 
> The playlist that Jinsoul created for Jungeun really exists and it's on Spotify, the title is the same: "From: Me, To: Jungeun".
> 
> That's it :) 
> 
> Follow me on twitter if you want: @heeIipves (the L is “heelip” is actually an I)


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